Indian Boris Doesn't Not Know How

Hello persons holy shits. So much to tell of Boris story, no times for kidding words. So sorry, but Boris will put in funny jokes times two in next time column.

Story does start with Boris living wild life thing on road with Angels from Hell friends, so much fun like road trip and sleepover all rolled inside same burrito. So cool yes, but then Angels from Hell friends does funny thing, selling Boris to this bar as cigar-selling Indian person. Good joke, Hell Angels. Is boring job, to stand outside bar with Indian hat on and do nothings, but is okay. Does give Boris time to think of columns and why come sky is blue when air is white, but clouds is white when water is invisible color. So strange.

Boris does miss Angels from Hell friends sometimes, but now has important job. Because persons does only like to buy cigars from Indians, and Boris is this pretend Indian. No person does know truth of Boris in this thing, them thinking Boris is 100% Indian meat. Only bad thing is persons does always come up to ask Boris "How?" but Boris doesn't not know how. Only real life Indians does know this.

Boris does not see Hell Angels since they did trade him to bar for case of beef jerkys. Like friend Bitch Killer does say, them must ramble on like shark thing that does not want to die. If shark stops the swimming, him does die because then he is eaten by angry fish, and same thing for Angels from Hell. Now Boris does has bad dreams about angry eating fish, no good.

Bar place is owned by Mahowney, big person who does smell like pickles all times. Mahowney tells story that Angels from Hell trade Boris because Boris stuffed animal collection does become too big to fit on chopping motorcycle, and no person likes Boris singing Motown all times. So Mahowney takes in Boris to live in little basement closet room with vacuum sucking cleaner and ball for bowling. Is okay, but ball does make shit pillow.

This is good new life for Boris for while, but does get tired of childrens shooting arrows at Indian Boris and Mahowney yelling not to smoke all cigars. So mean sometimes, this boss person, when Boris only wants to show all persons how good is smoking. Also Boris does try to eat cigar like in cartoon but that is such a sick tummy for non-cartoon person, trust Boris.

Soon Boris decide to leave this bar place, to take show on road, when finds out him cannot leave because is like Pinocchio. This is story of boy with real wood, you know the thing. Mahowney will not let Boris go until paid for beef jerkys and so many cigars, such expensive things never to happen because Boris gets paid only coins that persons drop on accidentally and that money is for to buy Runyons and Red Hots for snacking.

But is okay, because badguy Mahowney boss does not know Boris is so smart to burn down bar and escape from basement Pinocchio prison thing. To tell truth, this is accident from Boris smoking cigar in dark closet, but does work also as such smart plan for Boris to run away from capture, so nice.

Now, for what is Boris? Good questioning. Until gets boring, Boris thinks he is railway hobo person for adventure. Yes, Louis and Similar to Skippy dog would be so proud like Mother of Boris. Persons in Homeland who does say Boris is big turd on floor of life cannot see railroad hobo Boris now! Goodbye column.

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