|   The New Anne Frank Diary
You may be asking yourself what do I mean by my slightly smug title? Am I mocking the tragically short and tortured life of a little girl killed in a massive campaign of genocide? No. I embrace Anne Frank's courageous spirit and indomitable will... (9/5/05)
Highway to Hell
The list of sins I committed in a previous lifetime must still be rolling out somewhere, without end in sight. I can find no other explanation as to why I'm back here at the commune. I'm not sure if I feel more like Martin Sheen in Apocalypse... (3/28/05)
Burn, Bridges, Burn
Strangely enough, it seems at least one person who isn't rich has benefited from the election of George W. Bush—that person is me. Make no mistake, politically, I am on the left and voted for Kerry, who is already fading from the memory like the... (12/13/04)
A Vote For Bush is A Vote For Bush! Bush!
Never before in the course of history has one nation so collectively possessed a mental deficiency.
How many polls must come out, one after the other, simply to infuriate me with the conflicting information that the president's approval rating... (10/18/04)
Just a Minor Setback in the Raoul Dunkin Story
Salutations to you, commune reader, assuming you're reading these columns and not merely gazing at the pretty colors while waiting for your Girls Gone Wild video clip to download. Forgive my gruff manner, but the Raoul Dunkin story has taken... (9/30/02)
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Milestones1993: Ramon Nootles graduates from San Dimas Community College with a degree in Questionable Journalism, the first degree of its kind offered in America, and a minor in Poontang Studies.Now HiringIron Monkey. We saw the movie and thought the ancient Chinese legend might be the guy to get the ninja we hired out of our offices. Lame-ass ninja, poison-darting Lefty the mail clerk and skittering across the tops of the computer towers.Top 5 commune Features This Week| 1. | Twins: God's Mistake | | 2. | HD-DVD, Blu-Ray Discs, Digital Tape, and 10 More Reasons to Stop Buying Movies | | 3. | Uncle Macho's Bathtub Tequila | | 4. | Touched by an Angel: "I Was Molested by Gabriel" | | 5. | Critic's Corner: How You Personally Ruined Western Culture | |
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