|   The New Anne Frank Diary
You may be asking yourself what do I mean by my slightly smug title? Am I mocking the tragically short and tortured life of a little girl killed in a massive campaign of genocide? No. I embrace Anne Frank's courageous spirit and indomitable will... (9/5/05)
Highway to Hell
The list of sins I committed in a previous lifetime must still be rolling out somewhere, without end in sight. I can find no other explanation as to why I'm back here at the commune. I'm not sure if I feel more like Martin Sheen in Apocalypse... (3/28/05)
Burn, Bridges, Burn
Strangely enough, it seems at least one person who isn't rich has benefited from the election of George W. Bush—that person is me. Make no mistake, politically, I am on the left and voted for Kerry, who is already fading from the memory like the... (12/13/04)
A Vote For Bush is A Vote For Bush! Bush!
Never before in the course of history has one nation so collectively possessed a mental deficiency.
How many polls must come out, one after the other, simply to infuriate me with the conflicting information that the president's approval rating... (10/18/04)
Just a Minor Setback in the Raoul Dunkin Story
Salutations to you, commune reader, assuming you're reading these columns and not merely gazing at the pretty colors while waiting for your Girls Gone Wild video clip to download. Forgive my gruff manner, but the Raoul Dunkin story has taken... (9/30/02)
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Milestones1969: Red Bagel finds true calling when he stumbles on to faked moon landing being filmed in his local neighborhood YMCA.Now HiringRing-Bearer. Seeking meek carrier of unholy evil, pure of heart and with will to accomplish impossible deed. Three references and two years of experience necessary, start at minimum wage.Top More Things to Do With a Severed Finger| 1. | Donate it to shop teachers in need | | 2. | Really get your waiter's attention | | 3. | Confuse the hell out of C.S.I. | | 4. | Pick your friends and your nose | | 5. | Dip it in gold; make yourself an "I'm # 1" award | |
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