Boguslaw Sadowski

Not to worry, Boris is here!

Yes, yes, thank you. Happy at seeing you too.

Today big day for Boris, today getting camera day! Boris getting camera for to take picture of airplane in sky. Yay! Real nice camera come with film inside already. This is thoughtful of camera people.

Boris taking sky picture of airplane because someone is coming. And someone is… tada! Boguslaw Sadowski. Boguslaw coming in plane and Boguslaw is cousin of Boris. Hooray for Boris! On happy today cousin is coming. So Boris to take picture of plane in sky, to have picture of Boguslaw inside plane like olive in can of olives.

In Homeland, cousin Boguslaw always in jail all times. But not in America! In America, jail only for persons who is not having fun. And Boguslaw is always having fun and shooting pistol so no problemo for Boguslaw.

Boris and Louis pick up Boguslaw Sadowski at airplane store, which is fun place. All secret magic machines which tell if Boris is wearing underwears or no. But Boris fools smart machine when wearing swim trunks inside pants! Ha! Machine smart, Boris smart more.

On car drive home Boris tell funny story of time cousin Boguslaw burn down warehouse of man who owes money. But fire gets too big and burn down zoo next of door! Oh no Boguslaw! Such a funny time, with animals all over and bears are angry. Boguslaw go to jail for stealing kangaroo, funny law to have.

Boris getting home with cousin and in apartment is big sign which say:

"OH SHIT, HERE IS BOGUSLAW!"

Very nice greeting for very nice cousin.

Boris think it time to play fun game for everyone, Hi Ho Cherry-O. Trust Boris, is fun game with cherries. Boguslaw thanks Boris for sign, but has to leave to make money! Boguslaw already has job? So smart for him. Boris could learn from this cousin, and also how to speak as Hal Pacino. Boguslaw is outside making gangster money while Boris putting cherries in bucket, no good for Boris.

Boris tells Boguslaw of plans for fun cousins day, playing the extra-small golfing and going to naked movie. Boguslaw wanting Louis to come, but robots are not fair at golfing, them always win like James Woods. No fair for Boris. Funny part is Boguslaw not believe Louis is real robot! Like fake robot can drive car? Ha! Boguslaw have much to learn about America.

Boris say goodbye to cousin Boguslaw and to visit when taking break from washing of money. Is good to have family in new homeland. Louis is like family, like robot brother on funny TV show. But Boguslaw is family who can get wet, which is important also.

Green is Card
Boris watching T.V. in the night to see funny man speaks of Jesus. Favoritefunny show this week for Boris, man with fiberglass hair say thing of lord infunny voice all times. "PRAISETHEJESUS!" he yell and Boris is laughing. Boristell this joke to... (2/17/03)

Boris is Superbowl Party
Ah, hello! How'd it happen? Yes, yes, Boris is good too. Already Boris feel American like John Sinatra. Louis teach about football, andcheese in can. What wonderful thing! Boris press button on can, and cheese jumpout like "Here I am to eat!"... (2/3/03)

Hello From Robot Apartment
Hello, country! Boris is returned with more column. Nice of you asking Boris fine! Yes, yes. Boris is lovely with life in new country. Already life like exciting rollingcoaster. One time, you say "Hey, this is fun, I am in crazy train car!" and... (1/20/03)