Quote of the Day
“How does it feel? To be on your own? With no direction home? Not even an amber alert? And nobody's bound to look in this van, so keep quiet and just try to enjoy yourself.”
-Bobby Molesterman, now doing 15-25Fortune 500 Cookie
Nobody thought it was funny when you said you snorted your dad's ashes, so it's best not to mention going bowling with your mom's skill—your first instinct was right, nobody gets your sense of humor. Tough love is not the only kind of love, except in prison, so you'd better learn to like it. Lucky Strikes—smoke 'em if you got 'em.
Try again later.Top 5 Concessions to Iran for Freeing British Prisoners
| 1. | Give Iranian cricket team real shot at the World Cup |
| 2. | Current prisoners traded for Ian MacKellen, who can hopefully deliver more convincing confession |
| 3. | Just one more season of Ricky Gervais' The Office |
| 4. | Three words: Spandau Ballet Reunion |
| 5. | Stab at pissing off the second-largest military force in the West before taking on the biggest not as successful as expected |
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