Milestones
1858: 26th president and idol of Red Bagel Teddy Roosevelt is born, only a month before Bagel's birth. We know technically this is impossible, but we didn't get cushy date-checking jobs by questioning the big man.Now Hiring
Bounced Czech. Resume and references not necessary, any Czechoslovakian expatriate thrown out of a club will do. True, we don't really have any job for such a person to occupy, but wouldn't it be funny to say we have a bounced Czech on staff? Think about it.Ill-Conceived Vacation Getaways
| 1. | Locked in steamer trunk with mother-in-law. |
| 2. | North Platte, Nebraska. Was thinking of a different North Platte. |
| 3. | The hottest part of the sun. In July. |
| 4. | Feral Monkey Zone Theme Park. Provo, Utah. |
| 5. | The sweet release of death. |
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