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Quote of the Day
“If you can't stand the heat, turn down the goddamned heater.”

-Cheri S. Truman
Fortune 500 Cookie
You will find great happiness in wok. Be on the lookout for signs, they may guide you to riches or prevent you from driving on the railroad tracks. A large dog will determine your fate. Remember: Just a dab heals dry skin, but larger quantities can lube an entire baby. Lucky numbers: 0, 0, 0, 6.


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Top Easter Memories
1.Stuffing all those eggs up the bunny's ass. For the children.
2.Knee-deep in Peeps.
3.Kicked out of church for eating wooden Jesus. Thought it was chocolate.
4.I'll be damned, family really can tell ham from Spam.
5.Boil the eggs next year. Sweet Jesus, boil the motherloving eggs.
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