Boris is Ready for Some Football

Hello, reading persons. Yes yes, is Boris. How are you? Oh well, that is not so good. Boris hopes you are soon to find some happiness under miserable rock of life.

Is there secret to such thing? Boris does not know. But Boris does know thing that is Boris is ready for some football.

Reader of Boris may not know that there is magic person in hat who comes on TV to ask Boris questions. Yes, is true, Boris is not talking of shit. Man is like fat cowboy to guide Boris through life. Is strange yes, fat cowboy is like conscience thing for Boris, like Jimmy cricket in cartoon movie. Or like alien friend for Flintstone in other movie, except Boris does not get alien or bug thing. No persons can know how come they get conscience that is strange thing like talking noodle or cowboy with guitar. Is magic of life.

Boris conscience does not say helping things, is not that kind of conscience. No saying "Boris, is good to unplug egg beater before licking frosting off those things" or "Boris, do not pour soda on duck." Nope. Him only to ask Boris questions, or maybe one question. Thinking conscience may ask other questions when Boris is not watching TV, but so far only see him ask "Are you ready for some football?"

Boris thinks about this for some days and decided. Yes, Boris is ready for some football.

Reader can remember time when Boris watches Superbowl and is so fun. This is football thing. Louis explain is not like soccer football, which is sport where persons puts on shorts and get kicked in the jimmy. That is stupid hurting game. Football is where persons fight until they fall down dead and then man runs to grass party place and dances. This is game Boris understand.

Baseball is sport does not make sense to Boris. Boris think should be called "Asshole." Yes, is true. Two mens is trying to play catch but big asshole with stick wants to mess up game. And him will not go home, just waits and waits until person throws ball to friend. Then big asshole hits ball with stick and runs away. Boris knows this game from homeland, except there it is called "Time to get new ball."

But baseball is more crazy because persons playing catch have friends who come and get ball for them, whole gang of persons. But then asshole has gang of friends who sneak around and pretend to be like other friends, but they do not get ball, asshole gang runs away when ball comes. Is very confusing. Boris does not like this game, except when person does hit bully in head with ball. So funny for him to fall down like Godzilla. Boris does clap for this brave part.

Hockey is other strange game. When is cold out, Boris understand persons does go inside building to be warm. This is smart. But when is warm, why person does go inside to be cold and watch mens fight on little pond? What is this? Is like wrestling without fun costumes and yelling. And hockey men does put down sticks to fight. No way. Persons should fight with sticks and kill others fast so Boris can get out of cold room.

So for answer of question, yes Boris is ready for some football, but not other things. And now Boris must watch TV to see if little fat cowboy has other questions or if him can teach Boris to magic fly like Peter Pants. Boris hoping answer is yes.

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