Don't Be So Hard-On the President![]() August 16, 2000 I'm sure there's many a people thinking "Our president should step down! It's better to resign than face an impeachment trial." I happen to disagree vehemently. I know in times past I've stated how much I disagree with things vehemently and it was apparent my only reason for disagreeing was to use the word "vehemently" with frequency, but this time, I most certainly disagree vehemently for other reasons.
It is certainly not conceivable to me that our President lied or obstructed justice. I've read and reread all the transcripts in that Ken Starr report. It was everyone who had President under oath who failed the American people. If they thought President should not be given blow jobs, it should be more specifically stated in the Constitution. Is it in there? Take a moment to go read it. I'll wait here. President never once lied. When all these boneheads asked about "sexual relations" and "improper relationships" with that Monica Lewinsky girl he told them "No" in all honesty. How could anyone call a few dozen blow-jobs a "relationship"? And we all know blow-jobs aren't sex. Hell, if they were, that would mean I've cheated on my wife approximately three hundred sixty-two times in my marriage of three decades to my beloved wife, Arvelyn. With everyone from pizza delivery girls to the President of the Loyal Order Water Buffalo. Why must people be such moral bores? If we didn't want a rowdy hillbilly to get his li'l Congress "approved" in the White House, we shouldn't have gotten rid of our king. Milestones1983: Red Bagel is thrown out of a casino for counting cards. He is not cheating, merely trying to settle a bet with a friend on how many decks the casino uses.Now HiringJames Bondian Action Hero. Must be proficient in fire arms and small mechanical gadgets with ridiculous capabilities. Responsibilities include killing unnamed lackeys and doing battle with bizarre supervillians of non-distinct European origin. Good benefits, adventure, and pussy galore.Top Bad Gift CDs
Your Trash Is Now My Problem Hello, good people. Once again we've got a situation on our hands. I'm sure you don't need me to elaborate what I'm talking about. So I will. Several weeks ago young hooligans whose names I'm unaware of began dumping their garbage on my lawn. As... (7/14/00) |