05/3/26
You can't spell 'patriot' without 'a riot'
|  Vase  November 4, 1999 "Mom had this vase given to her in Great Aunt Mable's will and she loved it dearly. It sat on a wooden table in front of our picture window. I think it was from Japan. All I remember was the funny blue lines that decorated its pale, white surface. She told all of us kids never to touch that vase. I asked her if I could put things in it and she told me, 'Only on special occasions.'
Turns out finding three dozen night crawlers isn't a special occasion." Quote of the Day“What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is. Jesus, I'm wasted.”-Dan Quayle Fortune 500 CookieDon't stop thinking about tomorrow—we hear if you're late to your own castration they charge double. Anyone can be a hero to a small child, just buy a monster truck and never take your sunglasses off. Try eating more greens: we find it hilarious and it pisses off those asshole golfers. This week's lucky medical procedures not covered by Medicaid: assectomy, therapeutic genital massage, gene therapy for "itchy taint," installation of a second "failsafe" spare heart—baboon or otherwise, and goat removal.Try again later. Top Positive Changes Inspired by Va. Tech Massacre
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Reproduction in hole or in parts without permission is likely to piss off her dad big time.