05/21/26
More fun than an alcoholic stepdad
|  Vase  November 4, 1999 "Mom had this vase given to her in Great Aunt Mable's will and she loved it dearly. It sat on a wooden table in front of our picture window. I think it was from Japan. All I remember was the funny blue lines that decorated its pale, white surface. She told all of us kids never to touch that vase. I asked her if I could put things in it and she told me, 'Only on special occasions.'
Turns out finding three dozen night crawlers isn't a special occasion." Quote of the Day“Be always on the phone, so that when the devil calls, he will get your voicemail.”-St. Jerry Fortune 500 CookieJust because you don't like the message, don't waste your time killing the messenger. John of Lancaster already took care of that for you 500 years ago. New scientific breakthroughs now make it possible to wash your hair while it's still attached to your head: no more tedious cutting and re-attaching with naval knots. Try to remember: Chex are for breakfast, checks are for paying bills. You will mix those up again this week. This week's lucky dogs: Lassie's offspring still living off residuals, all Irish breeds, and the two-legged one-balled variety.Try again later. Top Reasons for Quitting Your Job
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Reproduction in hole or in parts without permission is likely to piss off her dad big time.