Blog

by Violet Tiara

May 28, 2007

There was a frog
on my pog
until a dog
ate the pog
and a log
ate the dog
on a jog
yes, the log
then a clog
ate the log
and a bog
ate the clog
and in the bog
swam a hog
in the smog
sent from Prague

as I slog
through eggnog
like a cog
and a polliwog
recalls the frog
on the pog
and a dog
drops a log
where I jog
and a hair clog
in the bog
chokes the hog
in the smog
and in Prague
Praguers slog
sipping eggnog
through a cog
while a Golliwog
offends the frog
smells the pog
bites the dog
and writes a blog.

Quote of the Day

“Do unto others how you would do unto somebody who you knew for sure would do the same stuff back to you that you did to them, only in reverse. On second thoughtâ€¦ just be nice, okay asshole?”

-Beazus Frist, CPA

Fortune 500 Cookie

Nobody likes a smartassâ€¦ wait a minute, everybody loves a smartass. It's you they don't like. In an effort to make your personality more rounded and appealing, try learning the Tibetan Touch of Death this week. Remember, God made it hard to get your tongue into your own ass for a good reason. This week's lucky prescriptions: Cockgromax, Deuglycontin, Halitosinex, Slopecia, Lilpenihance, Fucoft.

Try again later.

Worst Things to Yell in Church

1.	"Who the hell I gotta fuck to get a communion wafer around here?"
2.	"Father, bless me for I have pissed the confessional againâ€¦"
3.	"Altar boy sleepover? Bitchin'!"
4.	"Gawd, did you see that dude up there nailed to that cross? Creeeep-y!"
5.	"Am I the only one here for the monster truck show?"

Nice Smile
Teeth made from beef are a source of great grief for Leif and a thief with the brief name of Queef. Chewing with meat is a feat quite neat, but a taste far from sweet when heat makes meat excrete. The Dentist, an apprentice, was a Chicagoland... (3/19/07)

Meat in the Ground
Toasters are boasters and otters are modest but the lotto you bought was for the wrong archipelago. Mangy changers are deranged, sez strange Jessica Lange. Druids love fluids but who is the wiser the Kaiser? On rye, sir, that miser misspelt... (4/10/06)

Nanotech Speckles
Nanotech speckles form freckles electronic, bionic and fair On my face and the space around as sound pleasing sound eeks from the sparkles there in my glittery hair Bear hair, cloned re-zoned to my bald scalp like carpeting the Alps like... (12/12/05)