11/26/25
You wanna piece of this?!?
|  Brandy is Dandyby Jay Salinas   May 9, 2005 Brandy is dandy
and wine is fine but liquor is quicker and vodka divine. Gin makes you sicker and slows down your ticker when you pull down your knickers so more freely to bicker. Thunderbird is a wonder, stirred and Night Train makes my veins strain to carry some of that good stuff to my heart. Bacardi? Sounds like a party, Marty best not to be tardy if you want any more than a sip. But far finer than beer is Everclear, the king of all the liquors. And when you wake you'll contemplate why your ass is packed with Snickers. And why a train in the Alps? Complain and with distain I shall mock thee. For to wake like such is really too much more than the finest hopes worth hoping. A sewer that's newer or a brewer reviewer's front lawn: now those are blackout locations. In a cage of bamboo in the hills of Peru, that's practically a vacation. In a birch bark canoe impaled on a pool cue, sure beats waking up on a space station. As a victim of kung-fu realizing you swallowed a kazoo, still beats the men's room of a gas station. All covered in glue sick with the Vietnamese flu, at least then you're free from temptation. On the campus of Screw U with a tattooed wazoo? At least you're getting an education. In the cartoon milieu with Yogi and Booboo, that, my friend, will earn you a standing ovation. But on the lamb with Pooh for murdering Kanga and Roo? Yeah, you could probably do better than that. Best to cut back on the Bacardi, sicko. Milestones1990: Red Bagel's dark vision of the future presented in lecture form at a local college predicts a war in Iraq, though he incorrectly predicts the date as 2002. Unless… well, we'll wait and see, won't we?Now HiringBartender. Mix all variety of drinks, serve beers with a quick smile and friendly expression. Listening a must, flipping bottles and spinning like in Cocktail a plus. Must know when to cut off Ramrod Hurley—immediately—and when to cut off Red Bagel—never, if you like your job.Top Reasons Why You Couldn't Have Killed Your Dead Wife
 My Love is Like an Orange My Love is Like an Orange, all shiny and orange and filled with a citrus burst to quench your lonely thirst. My love is not like porridge or storage or forage For my love is like an orange and… Bugger, nothing rhymes with orange.... (4/11/05) Blown by the Sun The night air like a cheese, perfumed with sea water A blocky, leaky, laggy cheese coating us all We the three of us tramp through Panama City Selling fake insurance policies for a dollar to The tourists The cops roust us here and there, upon... (4/4/05) Motherfucker Goose There was an old woman who lived in a shoe she had so many children she didn't even have to work I had to support them all because she's a liar Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard to get her poor dog a bone I porked the old crow ... (3/7/05)            |
Reproduction in hole or in parts without permission is likely to piss off her dad big time.