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10/6/26   
Like lamb on acid

Popular Road

by Sampson L. Hartwig
bio/email
February 7, 2005
I rode a horse on a winding path
And saw before me, though I'm bad at math
The path became two roads ahead
One rocky and coarse, a bitch to tread

The safer course, apparent to sight
Was clean-cut and easy, a porridge "just right"
With either path my choice to choose
I took the path less apt to bruise

Yes, I took the road well-traveled
And my seams kept sewn, my sweater stayed raveled
My shoes suffered no pain or remorse
Nor did my steed—just ask my horse



Sure, it was crowded, and baked by the sun
And assholes surrounded by whole metric ton
Paved by cruelty and sadness and greed
And it smelled like someone had been toking weed

Maybe I got there two hours later
And missed the buffet of free steak and taters
But anything's better than being some jerk
Who brags about taking the path of more work


Milestones
1988: Red Bagel's screenplay based on the cover up of the Challenger disaster is rejected for production and accused of being plagiarized from Tootsie.
Now Hiring
Rib Sandwich. Tasty barbecue rib sandwich, no experience required, must be available noon today. If position works out, could invite you back every week and some weekends. Please contact Ned Nedmiller at the commune.
Top 5 Bush Second-Term Pledges
1.Encourage nations to work with us again, under threat of violence
2.Pay national deficit with Discover and Visa cards
3.Appeal to black constituents by finally selling off "Amos & Andy" videos
4.Build new wing of America so rich people can vacation more
5.Two, maybe even three more inaugurations
Archives
The Road to Budokan
On the road to Budokan I met a man named Rama Dan. And Rama Dan had a dog named Frog, who hopped like the same. Frog also wore a green polystyrene suit, serving to make the resemblance more acute. Frog didn't know what a frog was or that... (1/31/05)

Drained Heart
My heart is empty like the keg on the porch Why, Denise, why? To drive home is ... (1/17/05)

Party Girl
Paris Hilton can kiss my ass, since when is that bitch the Head of the Class? That greasy skank's a Dennis who can't bring no menace. That's if she even knows what an ass is! Man, I've got an ass that surpasses, she barely even has one... (12/20/04)

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