Drained Heart

by Bartimere Gong

January 17, 2005

My heart
is
empty
like the keg
on
the porch
Why, Denise,
why?

To drive home
is
fine
designated driver
you
volunteered

But to drive
home
with Mitch
Mitch the
Bitch
we call him

Why, Denise,
why?

They all say
he
bags everybody
will fuck
any
thing in a skirt
That includes
Mac
Kenna the Scottish
Exchange Student
No
I do not shit you

Why, Denise,
why?

I will still
take
you back
unless
you
fucked him

Even
I
have standards

Quote of the Day

“There's more than one way to skin a cat. But only one reason: cat skin tacos.”

-Emil the Lonely Chef

Fortune 500 Cookie

You will become unbearably wealthy this week, and pen a beautifully-written suicide note. Donkey meat tastes just like chicken, but don't leave the hooves on unless you want your dinner guests seriously freaking out on you. This week's lucky swear words: fafuck, dickfish, shatly, bitcheese, cashit, cabbageass, shitch.

Try again later.

Top KFC Image-Makeover Slogans

1.	Kids, Fun, and Cholesterol
2.	Karmic Food Co-op
3.	Killin' Fuckin' Chickens
4.	Koreans for Christ
5.	Kome Feed da Chiknz

Party Girl
Paris Hilton can kiss my ass, since when is that bitch the Head of the Class? That greasy skank's a Dennis who can't bring no menace. That's if she even knows what an ass is! Man, I've got an ass that surpasses, she barely even has one... (12/20/04)

New Diet!
Quiet! I'm going on a new diet! Now don't deny it, you know you wanna try it! Because a diet's way easier to do when the whole big world's on it with you! Gonna lose that baby fat that's been lurking around my tummy like a tapeworm ... (12/6/04)

Peace Frog
There's blood in the streets, there's meat on these sheets. What am I, sleeping with a butcher? Napping on crazy wax paper wrapped in crap vapors dreaming of walking on gongs past a sleeping pitbull. Goddamn is this song loud... (11/15/04)