Your Sister?

by Marcus McFadden

February 23, 2004

Your sister?
I kissed her,
because I thought she was you!
â€¦and you had the flu
that made you gain a pound or two.
Or twenty.
Seriously,
deliriously I did mack on her lips,
but I thought I was eating chips
all smothered in dips!

I was all crazy
and my vision was hazy
because I missed you!
And I thought I kissed you
but I guess I fucked your sister instead.

Did I say "fucked"?
What's wrong with my head?
Just kissed,
don't get so pissed!
She wasn't even that goodâ€¦
How'd I know she would
rip off my clothes
while I was watching my shows?

No I'm not insulting your sister!
I only kissed her,
I wouldn't know if she's awesome in the sack
with her nails down your back
and all that.
I don't know where I heard about that.
I made it up, I slipped on the bath mat
and cracked my skull on the tub
so she gave it a rub.

Hey the girl was confused,
I could have banged my cock on the tub!
Don't act so bruised!
But anyway that's it,
I banged my head and now all this crazy shit
keeps coming out my mouth.
Ignore it,
don't store it for later use
when some dude says your sister is loose.

It ain't an excuse,
so put down that noose!
This ain't no dance and song,
and you should be happy
your sister and I get along!

Damn. You think about it,
I could have rightly have slapped her
for ripping my nice shorts.

I mean I love you.

Quote of the Day

“Any man who serves as his own lawyer has a fool for a client. Because think about it, stupid, why you gonna pay some guy who didn't even go to law school? That's just dumb. And how do you pay yourself, anyway? Take your money out of one pocket and put it in the other? Silly. Or maybe you've got to hire a neutral third party to take the money and then hand it back to you, like a lawyer or somebody. Shit, this is gettin' expensive.”

-Dred Scott Drummond

Fortune 500 Cookie

You're simply the best, and that depresses us all. The next time you're on trial for murder, don't forget to mention that a Klondike bar was involved. And if you must ask for a lawyer who can get you off, at least try not to do it with that smarmy leer in your eye. Try chewing your food an odd number of times this week, like 6,372. This week's lucky injuries: hangnail, hangankle, ruptured spleen, stabitosis.

Try again later.

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