12/6/25
Shit sandwich
|   Rusty Klein A Chicago restaurant paid $106,000 for the controversial playoffs ball that could have cost the Cubs a shot at the series. They claim they want to destroy the ball and put the misery to an end for all the teams' fans, but all we can say is someone else has made a big fat profit off of a ball that's already caused a lot of heartbreak for Cub fans. — Professor Jeremy KleinMilestones1994: Omar Bricks arrested after setting a statue of the Virgin Mary ablaze atop the Ferris wheel at the State Fair. Gets off on a technicality that goes down in legal history as the Proud Mary defenseNow HiringFlamenco Dancer. Leggy Latin beauty needed to, well, you know. And dance. Must be disease-free and light on the orthodontia. Garden hose-based qualifications a big plus. Mus- wait. Really? Then what the hell's flamenco?Top 2004 Blockbuster Busts
 Shop Till You Drop Enjoying the shopping, the merchandise, the endless exchange of cash and the rampant exhaustive over-commercialization… but try not to forget the sugar plums. — A.D.... (12/8/03) Sympathy for Devils With the bombing of the British embassy in Turkey, terrorists are now striking targets in neighboring Islamic countries. What better way to win over your most potentially sympathetic audience than set off bombs next door! — Professor Jeremy... (11/24/03)            |
Reproduction in hole or in parts without permission is likely to piss off her dad big time.