the commune

Rusty Klein

President Bush has repeatedly the rebuilding of Iraq is going much smoother than the media would have us believe. Though the media is prone to sensationalism, is it really possible to "filter" in several attacks on civilian quarters, numerous dead soldiers, and strife between Iraqi and American forces? â€” Professor Jeremy Klein

Milestones

1965: commune columnist Rok Finger coins the slang term "Dingleberry" at a father-son picnic attended solely by his numerous illegitimate offspring.

Now Hiring

Doormat. Co-dependant with poor sense of boundaries needed to do the work of three men and two women, allowing the commune to do our part in this jobless recovery. Cot in back available for qualified applicant.

Top-Selling Halloween Masks

1.	John Kerry w/ matching beret
2.	George W. Bush w/ matching quizzical look
3.	Zorro's cheaper cousin Steve-o
4.	Me, only better
5.	Eddie Murphy circa 1986
6.	Gollum/Rupert Murdoch 2-year reusable mask
7.	Irresistible Sexy Man #34
8.	Scary Scream guy stealing "The Scream"
9.	'57 Studebaker
10.	That guy over there

The Ghost of Gore
Promising candidate Gen. Wesley Clark this week said good-bye to departing campaign manager Donnie Fowler, whose grass-roots efforts helped bring Clark into the presidential race. Fowler cited tension between recent Gore campaign managers hired onto... (10/13/03)

Telemarketing... Free Speech?!?
Federal justices believe a "do not call" list infringes on free speech as described in the Constitution? These guys have probably never been subjected to "free speech" at home during the dinner hour. Between these recent rulings and the debacle with... (9/29/03)