the commune

A.D. Enemy

Promising candidate Gen. Wesley Clark this week said good-bye to departing campaign manager Donnie Fowler, whose grass-roots efforts helped bring Clark into the presidential race. Fowler cited tension between recent Gore campaign managers hired onto staff, and worried the new additions are robbing Clark of his "outsider" approach to the campaign. Will the ghost of Gore doom the Democrats' new contender? â€” A.D. Enemy

Milestones

1999: Eurocommune opens, burns down four minutes later after an electrical outlet misunderstanding.

Now Hiring

Good Humor Man. Must be willing to drive around the commune offices in a circle 24 hours a day. Familiarity with The Farmer in the Dell strongly recommended. Dilly Bars a plus.

Hottest Christmas Toy Fads

1.	Dolly Pees N' Downloads
2.	PEZac Anti-Depressant Candies
3.	Bloodbung IV for Gamecube
4.	Golidie2k2 Robotic Goldfish
5.	Virtual Bike Training Wheels Disc
6.	West Nile Elmo
7.	FunFree Learn-o-station
8.	Britney Spears' Diaphragm Madness
9.	Bob the Builder with Catcall Voice Chip
10.	Collect or Die Trading Card "Game"

Telemarketing... Free Speech?!?
Federal justices believe a "do not call" list infringes on free speech as described in the Constitution? These guys have probably never been subjected to "free speech" at home during the dinner hour. Between these recent rulings and the debacle with... (9/29/03)

How I Won the War on Terror
Contrary to popular opinion, the president assures us it can be wonâ€”and it doesn't even take peace negotiations, concessions, or changing the way we conduct business around the planet! It just requires one more check. â€” A.D.... (9/15/03)