the commune

A.D. Enemy

It's a shame homosexual lobbies are using celebrity power like Richard Chamberlin and Melissa Etheridge to promote their ridiculous agenda of gay marriage, while opponents have to make due with meager politicians and wealthy religious figures. â€” A.D. Enemy

Quote of the Day

“My love is like a red, red wiiiineâ€¦ go to my heaaaadâ€¦ make me forgeeetâ€¦ Wait. Sorry. My love is like a red, red roseâ€¦ just like eeeeevery night has its daaaaaw- awawaaaanâ€¦ Just like eeeevery cooowboyâ€¦ Fuck.”

-A.D.Dobbs

Fortune 500 Cookie

Clowns don't hate you, they just feel sorry for you. Your "Don't Worry, Be Slappy" series of self-help books finally broke the five-copy sales barrier this week, and just got you sued by the estate of Slappy White. This week's lucky strikes: Clover-Workers' Union, ump didn't see ball careen off batter's jock and through strike zone, killed them all while they were dreaming about killing you, threw your ex-wife's severed head down lane on accident.

Try again later.

Worst Things to Yell in Church

1.	"Who the hell I gotta fuck to get a communion wafer around here?"
2.	"Father, bless me for I have pissed the confessional againâ€¦"
3.	"Altar boy sleepover? Bitchin'!"
4.	"Gawd, did you see that dude up there nailed to that cross? Creeeep-y!"
5.	"Am I the only one here for the monster truck show?"

War's Happening
He's a formerly well-respected European leader, and a pansy allegedly left-wing neat freak! He's an uptight American conservative with a double-digit IQ and a contempt for the Constitution! Together, they have sold two countries a badly-planned war... (7/21/03)

The Big Liberia
Isn't it too bad everyone insists on protesting the administration in the middle of conflict? People should really wait until everything is fine and dandy before disagreeing with the president. â€” A.D.... (7/7/03)