06/28/26
Like a game of Lonely, Lonely Hippos
|  America the Beautifartby Mrs. Jabonski's Third Grade Class   July 21, 2003 O beautiful farts stained the skies,
For lumber made of brains, For purple Muppet maggot fleas A dove went fruity--GAY! America! America! God shaves his balls with thee. And this other dude Had a brother who'd Frenched a seal in the slimy sea! Gross! O beautiful Ford Pinto fire, And beans that give dogs gas And fat kids who eat ding dongs Until they've got a King Kong ass! America! America! God shits some grapes on thee. And stick your butt in a Pizza Hut, Until they show it on TV! O beautiful sick weasels peed, On your grandma's electric fence. When the smoke cleared the minivan Was covered in weasel dents! America! America! God barfed his brains on thee. The president kissed a pig for Lent He thought was the Virgin Mary! O beautiful retarded flies, On a seasick lion's mane For Mrs. Jabonski's bad trick knee And her husband who is gay! (fruity) America! America! God waves his butt at thee. For the Batmobile did lose a wheel And the Joker got away! Hey! Quote of the Day“Fight back, men! It's not the size of the boat, it's the motion of the ocean!”-Capt. William Thomas Turner of the Lusitania Fortune 500 CookieLooks like your lawyers have kept those topless photos out of the magazine; that and the fact you're 89 years old. Tonight, conquer life's mystery: Find out what that Alpo tastes like. Today is great week to give the gift of peanut brittle. Shaved or unshaved? Your dogs will love you either way. Today's lucky charms: Pink hearts, blue moons, green clovers, virtually any of them.Try again later. Women Other Than Christina Ricci We Want Chained to Our Radiator
 Sleepwalkers Sleeping deeply, Major Fleeping rose though no alarm was beeping and made a sandwich of apple cores, which he chewed between the snores. Incessantly talking while sleepwalking, Lazlo Dennis beat at tennis a regional club pro, who, you know, ... (7/7/03) Learn About Rain The rain falls wet like sloppery skittles from the mouth of a stupid dog. The beautiful rain, it coats the trees like sex lubricant. But that's where the rivers come from. The rain slides down the trees like sweat down the crack of... (6/23/03) The Color of My Blade Is Chartreuse Who can compare the green of a sunset to the gray of a ham? Or the scarlet water that trickles down very nearly without a sound as the brown sky spans overhead… Have truer words been said? The vivid purple blood that gushes from a... (6/9/03)            |
Reproduction in hole or in parts without permission is likely to piss off her dad big time.