the commune

A.D. Enemy

He's a formerly well-respected European leader, and a pansy allegedly left-wing neat freak! He's an uptight American conservative with a double-digit IQ and a contempt for the Constitution! Together, they have sold two countries a badly-planned war and have to defend themselves! They may not get along, but now they're the only friends they have! â€” A.D. Enemy

Milestones

1982: Fred Connor born, grows up to lead successful rebellion against war of the machines in 2011. Or at least he would have been, if a Terminator hadn't successfully eliminated him from history, according to Research Editor Griswald Dreck.

Now Hiring

Good Terminator. Talking to Griswald Dreck has made us see the wisdom of employing a preventative Terminator security system, preferably a skilled Terminator robot who has been reprogrammed to protect commune staff members. No pay or retirement plansâ€”yours is not to reason why, just to do and die.

Least Successful David Bowie Incarnations

1.	Wacky Far-Out Space Nut
2.	Lithe, Quirky, Effeminate Heterosexual
3.	Gold-Suited Game Show Host Mutt Smalley
4.	Evil Twin Brother Donald Bowie
5.	Lou Bega

The Big Liberia
Isn't it too bad everyone insists on protesting the administration in the middle of conflict? People should really wait until everything is fine and dandy before disagreeing with the president. â€” A.D.... (7/7/03)

Hillary Potter
Watch the former First Lady magically distance herself from the White House scandals and make a viable presidential bid appear out of thin air! â€” A.D.... (6/23/03)