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03/12/26   
Breaking down barriers like a drunken Mario Andretti


A.D. Enemy

Isn't it too bad everyone insists on protesting the administration in the middle of conflict? People should really wait until everything is fine and dandy before disagreeing with the president. — A.D. Enemy










Quote of the Day
“What a waste it is to lose one's mind. Or not to have a mind is being very wasteful. How true that is. Jesus, I'm wasted.”

-Dan Quayle
Fortune 500 Cookie
Don't stop thinking about tomorrow—we hear if you're late to your own castration they charge double. Anyone can be a hero to a small child, just buy a monster truck and never take your sunglasses off. Try eating more greens: we find it hilarious and it pisses off those asshole golfers. This week's lucky medical procedures not covered by Medicaid: assectomy, therapeutic genital massage, gene therapy for "itchy taint," installation of a second "failsafe" spare heart—baboon or otherwise, and goat removal.


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Top 5 commune Features This Week
1.Other Bad Deals Faust Made
2.7 New Ways to Leave Your Lover
3.This Season's Sexy New Parkas
4.Uncle Macho's Superior Hamburgers
5.Critic's Corner: You
Archives
Hillary Potter
Watch the former First Lady magically distance herself from the White House scandals and make a viable presidential bid appear out of thin air! — A.D.... (6/23/03)

Abbas Road: Middle East Peace Talks
Copping the stance of great men doesn't make for great men. — A.D.... (6/9/03)

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