the commune

A.D. Enemy

Isn't it too bad everyone insists on protesting the administration in the middle of conflict? People should really wait until everything is fine and dandy before disagreeing with the president. â€” A.D. Enemy

Milestones

1982: Rok Finger's scheduled sex change operation is cancelled when he's told the technology does not yet exist to change your sex from "Bone Dry in Death Valley" to "Gettin' Some."

Now Hiring

Goofus. Extreme cosmic fuck-up needed to offset commune staff as a whole boatload of Gallants. Pratfalls a plus. Strike that: Apparently we already filled this position with some Pludd guy months ago. Thought he was just an office in-joke, sorry.

Top 5 Michael Jackson Trial Revelations

1.	Sleeping with children in your bed only huge moral quaqmireâ€”not illegal
2.	Elephant Man bones were delicious
3.	"Thriller" song autobiographical
4.	Body almost 78% artificial ingredients
5.	Jackson himself a delusional product of being raised in the spotlight; middle name Joseph

Hillary Potter
Watch the former First Lady magically distance herself from the White House scandals and make a viable presidential bid appear out of thin air! â€” A.D.... (6/23/03)

Abbas Road: Middle East Peace Talks
Copping the stance of great men doesn't make for great men. â€” A.D.... (6/9/03)