Learn About Rainby Dixon LaRue ![]() June 23, 2003 The rain falls wet like
sloppery skittles from the mouth of a stupid dog. The beautiful rain, it coats the trees like sex lubricant. But that's where the rivers come from. The rain slides down the trees like sweat down the crack of your ass and puddles on the ground where a child could drown if it were sleeping or hog-tied or just plain stupid. Those puddles slink across the soil like creeping wet things to form creeks, which conspire to form streams which fuck together into rivers. Rivers are like a freeway of water drops, all the drops cutting each other off and screaming profanely. You can hear them. But it's not like a freeway because ducks can't float on the freeway or logs or alligators with frogs on their backs. Quick! Jump in the hole with the fly! Where frog sex can occur and the bonus round is secured. The rain fills up the ocean and lakes, but in the roundabout way, like a drunk peeing on the wall, instead of in the dixie cup you gave him. Nature is like that dirty drunk. That is the lesson. Milestones1853: The snorkel is invented, leading indirectly to the conception of commune reporter Lil Duncan several years later. STD specialists from the CDC would eventually send a robot back in time in an attempt to prevent this chain of events from occurring, but tragically this move caused the Short Circuit franchise of films in the 1980's instead.Now HiringMidwife Crisis. Not entirely sure what this is, but the guys thought it would be funny. So… Hmm. Uh… well, if you have experience delivering babies in a dramatic and dangerous fashion, then I suppose you should dust off your résumé. No freaks please.Top 5 commune Features This Week
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