the commune

A.D. Enemy

Copping the stance of great men doesn't make for great men. â€” A.D. Enemy

Milestones

2003: The infamous "Battle of the Bulge" breaks out at when office wench Ivana Folger-Balzac mistakes Ramrod Hurley's beerbelly for a birthing alien larvae and sets into the Acting-Editor with a can opener. The skirmish and resultant standoff lasts 18 hours and claims the lives of several Crochet! magazine staffers, for whom the commune observes a moment of near-silence.

Now Hiring

Sexecutioner. Why does everybody keep laughing when we say that? We need a dude who can kill some fucking people in an official capacity, okay? What's so funny about that? You guys are sick. Anyway, pay commensurate to experience. Must provide own mask, axe, electric chair, whatever floats your boat.

Top Reasons for Increased U.S. Ladder-Associated Deaths

1.	"Up/Down" directions never specified
2.	Reckless Generation Y refuses to wear protective equipment
3.	Ladder-deaths portrayed so glamorously in the movies
4.	Frequent union strikes by staircases leaving human helpless to descend to higher landings except by already overcrowded ladders
5.	Direct correlation to 50% increase in all-blind-cast productions of Our Town

The Tax Cut
Congress has recently passed a $350 billion tax cut designed by President Bush to boost the economy, but can a cut that only adds to a ballooning federal deficit have any effect but to shake a nation's confidence in its government while saddling... (5/26/03)

Safter with Nukes?
Wherever you stand on the Bush presidency, the White House's encouragement that Congress lift a 10-year ban on small-scale nuclear weapons must at least seem short-sighted. Coming out of a war with a comparatively low body count where nuclear... (5/12/03)