Mom

by Bartimere Gong

May 26, 2003

To stand under
the eyes of mom
the judging glare
of mom

To be shivered
by hands of mom
face like raisins
of mom

To be insulted
the tongue of mom
bitter questions
of mom

I have no job
the truth to mom
rent does not care
dear mom

Don't get me wrong
I love dear mom
the constant bitch
dear mom

One of these days I will have a million dollars
one of these days I will have a house on the hill
one of these days mom will need money for medicine
or clothes or food or shoes or walkers or old people things

I will give it to her
but not without a
lot of needling
dear mom

Quote of the Day

“Impartiality is a pompous name for indifference, which is an elegant name for Cletus, my inbred asscrack of a neighbor about whom I am far from indifferent.”

-CK Festerchild

Fortune 500 Cookie

You wir find gleat rove in an ord flend. That's not an accented translation; you just have a really weird fortune this week. It's time to face the facts, or at least the facts of life: even if you manage to get that face you drew on your hand pregnant, it's just going to be one more mouth to feed. This week's lucky ringtones: Hangin' Tough, Mmm Mmm Mmm Mmm, Two Princes, Kokomo.

Try again later.

Top Fake Names Used for Fraudulent Repeat Voting

1.	Reginald Bushsucks
2.	Jon Bon Jovi
3.	Sir Votesalot
4.	John Jacob Jesushammersshit
5.	Barack Obama

Party Bus
Vincent Van Gogh where did you go? If you'd have just waited for me I'd have been your buddy. We could have got sandwiches and drove around in my van. That would've been pretty fun, sorry you missed it man. Ernest Hemmingway, you too... (5/12/03)

Up, Up and Away
Up, up and away in my beautiful balloon! Not a sound as I lift off the ground. Piss on you suckers and your ground-standing! Goddamn there sure are a lot of birds up here, and not just cute ones. I could swear some of these birds have... (4/28/03)

Ray Manatino's Reworked Classics
Whose woods are these, I think I know. I think they belong To that guy named Joe Who lives down the street From Peggy and Ray And set his own pants On fire one day. He was sniffing lighter fluid In the dark When he lit a match And his... (4/14/03)