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02/23/26   
You can't spell 'patriot' without 'a riot'


Rusty Klein

Hiding under a barrage of Iraq media coverage, the Republicans again worked to undermine gains in women's reproductive rights by passing their ban on partial-birth abortions through the Senate. Even if the war with Iraq is a dismal failure, the GOP is already succeeding in attempts to rollback Democratic policies won by the Clinton White House, with the American public none the wiser. — Professor Jeremy Klein










Milestones
1996: Red Bagel fires entire commune staff during "Crazy Bagel's Everything Must Go Liquidation Madness" phase of the commune's August Sale-abration. Analysts praise Bagel for ridding his staff of junkies and losers, who he promptly replaces with the current batch of junkies and losers.
Now Hiring
Bloodhound. Needed to track down former commune staffer Smilin' Jack Costello, who disappeared in May, still owing $8 to the office petty cash fund. Smart dog needed who is not fooled by turbans or overly distracted by running foxes. Generous wages to be paid in beef kidneys.
Top Oprah Book Club Rejections
1.The Venomous Black Bitch by Phil Donahue
2.Fried Pork Cracklin's in Butter by Flanny Fragg
3.The Happy and Compliant Slave by Newt Whiteny
4.How Stella Left Her Groove Under the Seat on the Plane Ride Back by Terry McMillan
5.Fight Club by Jerry Springer
Archives
Cloning Science
Science has succeeded in cloning, first sheep, now possibly humans—if you limit success to the creation and not the quality of life. Dolly, the cloned sheep, was put to death at 6 years old this week, half the life of a natural-born sheep. It... (2/17/03)

Israeli Politics
President Sharon's brutal military strikes on Palestine just days before the Israeli elections has all the stink of political posturing and pandering to the base emotions of the lowest common denominator. But can such a lack of political integrity... (2/3/03)

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