the commune

Rusty Klein

Science has succeeded in cloning, first sheep, now possibly humansâ€”if you limit success to the creation and not the quality of life. Dolly, the cloned sheep, was put to death at 6 years old this week, half the life of a natural-born sheep. It looks like once again our science has surpassed our common sense. â€” Professor Jeremy Klein

Milestones

1979: Some people call Red Bagel a space cowboy (wahnt-waaow). Ignorant to popular culture, Bagel burns his driver's license and spends two years living underground as Miguel Carlos Ferrina.

Now Hiring

Small Town Rube. Trustworthy innocent needed to flush gremlins out of elevator system. Competitive wage to be paid upon successful completion of duties. No Sci-Fi geeks, please.

Least Requested Christmas Gifts

1.	Sleepover at Neverland Ranch
2.	Likes-it-Rough Elmo
3.	Virtual Crackbaby
4.	Inoperable Brain Tumor
5.	Hot Toddy, the hottest doll of 1922
6.	New Matrix sequels
7.	Saddam Hussein action figure with Hideaway Hovel playset
8.	Online Predator Chat for X-Box Live
9.	Four More Years
10.	No Hope for the Holidays, an all-star Christmas Depression

Israeli Politics
President Sharon's brutal military strikes on Palestine just days before the Israeli elections has all the stink of political posturing and pandering to the base emotions of the lowest common denominator. But can such a lack of political integrity... (2/3/03)

Anti-Drug Education
In an outrageous effort to quell worries about drug involvement in the recent accidental bombing of a Canadian infantry unit by two American fighter pilots on amphetamines, the U.S. military has presented experts claiming the intake of amphetamines... (1/20/03)