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08/9/26   
Finally! A website that treats me like an automaton!


Rusty Klein

Once again George Bush has proven that Democrats excel at domestic issues while the Republicans falter. Blowing the budget surplus on a minor tax break made him popular for a little while, but we've wasted our budget surplus before hitting on hard times with the current recession—which is what a budget surplus should be saved for. — Professor Jeremy Klein










Quote of the Day
“Yawn and the world yawns with you. Fart and you fart alone.”

-Dr. Filbert
Fortune 500 Cookie
Stop taking it so personally when everyone tells you how ugly you are. At least you're getting noticed. That breakfast cereal you made out of Tic Tacs sure has helped your breath, but next week our crystal ball shows a diagnosis for cancer of the everything. They say dogs are a good judge of character, and even dogs don't like your screenplay. This week's lucky Tims: Tiny Tim, Spazzy Tim, Him Tim, Tim and Tim Again, Phantom Tim, Tim Saved in a Bottle.


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Top Outstanding commune Petty Cash Debts
1.Raoul Dunkin
$974.25 in mental anguish
2.Smilin' Jack Costello
$8, plus interest
3.Ned Nedmiller
1/8th of a cent
4.Mazie the Chicken
1 half cup of scratch
5.You Know Who You Are
1 human gall bladder
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