Milestones
1982: Fred Connor born, grows up to lead successful rebellion against war of the machines in 2011. Or at least he would have been, if a Terminator hadn't successfully eliminated him from history, according to Research Editor Griswald Dreck.Now Hiring
Good Terminator. Talking to Griswald Dreck has made us see the wisdom of employing a preventative Terminator security system, preferably a skilled Terminator robot who has been reprogrammed to protect commune staff members. No pay or retirement plans—yours is not to reason why, just to do and die.Top Cruel New Rumors
| 1. | Gay people can't whistle |
| 2. | Tennessee quarter shows state trooper harassing black motorist |
| 3. | French Stewart not actually French |
| 4. | Cats love vodka |
| 5. | Donald Trump is secret owner of McDonald's chain |
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