Milestones
1962: Modesto-area commune publishes first newsletter on hand-recycled paper with pressed soybean inks, detailing member birthdays and a potluck sign-up. commune lawyers from the year 2015 sue retroactively for eventual copyright infringement, winning custody of 74 cots and a large clay poop trough.Now Hiring
Shaman. Duties to include spells, incantations, curing minor STDs, opening bridge to the dreamtime, relieving crushing boredom of modern life, answering general tax questions and serving as an occasional drug connection. Knoweldge of dentistry a plus.Top Signs You May Be Obese
| 1. | File footage of your last beach trip keeps turning up on evening news "Obesity in America" segments |
| 2. | Telemarketers disgusted by sounds of your constant eating |
| 3. | Farm animals instinctively panic in your presence |
| 4. | Buffet mysteriously closed no matter when you arrive |
| 5. | You stopped for a snack in the middle of reading this list |
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