Milestones
1994: Omar Bricks arrested after setting a statue of the Virgin Mary ablaze atop the Ferris wheel at the State Fair. Gets off on a technicality that goes down in legal history as the Proud Mary defenseNow Hiring
Flamenco Dancer. Leggy Latin beauty needed to, well, you know. And dance. Must be disease-free and light on the orthodontia. Garden hose-based qualifications a big plus. Mus- wait. Really? Then what the hell's flamenco?Top Tax Filing Mistakes
| 1. | Classifying hooker money as charitable donations |
| 2. | Taxes owed paid in solid gold krugerrands |
| 3. | Claiming Willie Nelson already paid your taxes |
| 4. | Online tax-filing with X-Box 360 Live account |
| 5. | Attempting to personally deliver tax forms to president himself, accompanied by bonus ass-whupping |
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