![]() Marmalade and Laceby Melissa Torkens ![]() ![]() August 19, 2002 Marmalade and lace,
I step on your face as you draw back your bow. Where's the arrow? I don't know. These lovers' games without names… or at least maybe they should be. "Drunken Pump" robs my dignity, couldn't we call it "Double Indemnity"? You Probe me with your Ford while I hum My Sweet Lord and your Contours I memorize. My good name you blasphemise! We meet in the 'twain like orchids in the rain, the drops of which are nearly heard over the blaring Lynard Skynard. As you plunge deep into my soul, in your passion you try the wrong hole. Will your roguish fingers probe my labia? Don't be silly, you know what's a labia. Our souls have spanned all time to be together and in their unity we will last past forever. In your ear I gasp to catch breath, and uh… sure, I guess you can call me Beth.. The stars whisper tonight we will be as one because I see now that Friends is a re-run. Your love is too rich to regret… twenty seconds I will never forget. Quote of the Day“1.327493 is the loneliest number. Technically.”-Inglebert Thomas, Professor of Mathematics Fortune 500 CookieYou will quit smoking, but only in hospital nurseries. One step at a time, baby. You will finally lose that unwanted 50 pounds, thanks to a fortuitous kidnapping. The bank won't be your only withdrawal this week, drugnuts. You will believe everything you read.Try again later. Top 5 Worst States
![]() My New Lifestyle Monday, August 5, 2002 If I could ever be as free as a tree, I'd pee only Brie. My neighbors would see the beauty of me. I'd sing like a duck and have all the good luck. I'd dance for a buck and sleep in a truck I bought for a buck ... (8/5/02) State of the Union Jack Random parables are wearable surf sluts speak of Sarin gas like a bubble from Hitler's ass America's flying at half-mast Conspirators eat beer and s'mores while Dutch elves poison naked bears nobody cares what the emperor wears as long... (7/22/02) Your Honor A little dog choked on a draidel, a ladle, a can of beef stew and a wicker kazoo. His owner, a loner from Kalamazoo, in a wrath drew a bath that he filled up with glue. The soup of white goop he stirred with an oar and what's more he added the... (7/8/02) ![]() ![]() ![]() |