05/30/26
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|  My New Lifestyleby Wes Thurmon   August 5, 2002 Monday, August 5, 2002
If I could ever be as free as a tree, I'd pee only Brie. My neighbors would see the beauty of me. I'd sing like a duck and have all the good luck. I'd dance for a buck and sleep in a truck I bought for a buck and I'd laugh "Nyuk nyuk nyuk." What a beautiful day! I almost wish I was gay and I lived in L.A. What more can I say? What a wonderful life that would be… Eating green spinach pie, reading about Princess Di. Pausing briefly to sigh "These sad books make me cry!" But this dark purple tie is so stylish, I could die! But I won't 'cause it's great to be me… Yes this is the life I've waited for all my life. No more fat, naggy wife! No more mis'ry or strife! New gay lifestyle I love thee… People will talk of my beautiful cock that I keep in a sock under key under lock cause he's hard as a rock and he's covered in chalk and he can take a knock. He's a tough little chicken you see… My identity? Clarified! My new lifestyle? Verified! Wait, naked men? Terrified! Terrified! Terrified! New gay lifestyle I'll miss thee… Quote of the Day“My love is like a red, red wiiiine… go to my heaaaad… make me forgeeet… Wait. Sorry. My love is like a red, red rose… just like eeeeevery night has its daaaaaw- awawaaaan… Just like eeeevery cooowboy… Fuck.”-A.D.Dobbs Fortune 500 CookieClowns don't hate you, they just feel sorry for you. Your "Don't Worry, Be Slappy" series of self-help books finally broke the five-copy sales barrier this week, and just got you sued by the estate of Slappy White. This week's lucky strikes: Clover-Workers' Union, ump didn't see ball careen off batter's jock and through strike zone, killed them all while they were dreaming about killing you, threw your ex-wife's severed head down lane on accident.Try again later. Top 5 Bush Second-Term Pledges
 State of the Union Jack Random parables are wearable surf sluts speak of Sarin gas like a bubble from Hitler's ass America's flying at half-mast Conspirators eat beer and s'mores while Dutch elves poison naked bears nobody cares what the emperor wears as long... (7/22/02) Your Honor A little dog choked on a draidel, a ladle, a can of beef stew and a wicker kazoo. His owner, a loner from Kalamazoo, in a wrath drew a bath that he filled up with glue. The soup of white goop he stirred with an oar and what's more he added the... (7/8/02) Space Pioneers Life on earth did not much agree with Rufus McGee and Magilicutty Sneed. Two young boys, American as can be: American as trees, or Apples Dupree. On summer days they dreamed, on winter nights they schemed, lying there on their ... (6/24/02)            |
Reproduction in hole or in parts without permission is likely to piss off her dad big time.