My New Lifestyleby Wes Thurmon ![]() August 5, 2002 Monday, August 5, 2002
If I could ever be as free as a tree, I'd pee only Brie. My neighbors would see the beauty of me. I'd sing like a duck and have all the good luck. I'd dance for a buck and sleep in a truck I bought for a buck and I'd laugh "Nyuk nyuk nyuk." What a beautiful day! I almost wish I was gay and I lived in L.A. What more can I say? What a wonderful life that would be… Eating green spinach pie, reading about Princess Di. Pausing briefly to sigh "These sad books make me cry!" But this dark purple tie is so stylish, I could die! But I won't 'cause it's great to be me… Yes this is the life I've waited for all my life. No more fat, naggy wife! No more mis'ry or strife! New gay lifestyle I love thee… People will talk of my beautiful cock that I keep in a sock under key under lock cause he's hard as a rock and he's covered in chalk and he can take a knock. He's a tough little chicken you see… My identity? Clarified! My new lifestyle? Verified! Wait, naked men? Terrified! Terrified! Terrified! New gay lifestyle I'll miss thee… Quote of the Day“Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever. This means you, Gerardo.”-Napoleon Bugglyparte Fortune 500 CookieFinally, you'll win that annual shit-talkin' contest. If the shoe fits, it still means you only have one shoe, dumbass. It may hurt, but don't worry, they can re-attach it if you put the testicle on ice quickly. Don't buy the lottery ticket this week—your money is better invested in cookie dough. Lucky marbles: steely, cat's eyes, and… uh… shit, we're fresh out of marbles.Try again later. Favorite Porn Names
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