![]() State of the Union Jackby D.J. Mac Factor ![]() ![]() July 22, 2002 Random parables are wearable
surf sluts speak of Sarin gas like a bubble from Hitler's ass America's flying at half-mast Conspirators eat beer and s'mores while Dutch elves poison naked bears nobody cares what the emperor wears as long as he curtsies when he swears Ugly duckling nipple-suckling foreigners with blonde toupees cheering for the Oakland A's suffering through their own malaise The end is near, the beer is here wise up, rise up and get busy concubines will make you dizzy avoid them when they're in a tizzy Omar Bricks get the chicks Rok Finger gets the underage cripples When Bagel moves his ass ripples Lil gets down like Mr. Whipple Whatup, shutup bitch be a cut-up you can't play Bach on a busted up cello Bush ain't even black when he plays Othello best to be mellow like your ass was yellow. Quote of the Day“Yours is not to question why, yadda yadda yadda, just jump out of the goddamned plane already.”-Corporal "D-Wipe" Heisenhouser Fortune 500 CookieLet me be the first to say: Elastic Grandmacraps. You can run but you can't hide, and that's why you never got the Hide 'N Seek scholarship to Brown you had your hopes set on. Your character of Jasper the Friendly Goat will garner you the attention you've long desired this week, but will be much more of the legal variety than you had intended. This week's lucky animal cookies: dog, penguin, June bug, Oreo.Try again later. Top 5 Smart New Weight Loss Tips
![]() Your Honor A little dog choked on a draidel, a ladle, a can of beef stew and a wicker kazoo. His owner, a loner from Kalamazoo, in a wrath drew a bath that he filled up with glue. The soup of white goop he stirred with an oar and what's more he added the... (7/8/02) Space Pioneers Life on earth did not much agree with Rufus McGee and Magilicutty Sneed. Two young boys, American as can be: American as trees, or Apples Dupree. On summer days they dreamed, on winter nights they schemed, lying there on their ... (6/24/02) Do Not Disturb Combustible rustable grannies come marching in waves from the caves with their zinc eyebrows arching, in tunics with tonics electric on their lips, cities of biddies descend on our ships. "Great Montezuma!" cried Macbethle Macwire ... (6/10/02) ![]() ![]() ![]() |