Drink a Toast to the Liver

by Jay Salinas

May 13, 2002

Consider once
The lonely liver
Liver of a life deemed lower
By those organs hip and trendy
Who might be smaller or more bendy

Consider twice
The noble liver
Throbbing like a might river
Toiling in the depths and murky
When we drink too much Wild Turkey

Consider thrice
The liver proper
Filtering out those vodka poppers
The Benzadrine, horse tranquilizers
Of all the organs, you're the Kaiser

Consider thrice plus one
The liver's big day in the sun
Scooped up from where it's confined
Carefully with my guts aligned
A new liver, mine all mine!

Consider five times
The shitty liver
Life sustaining Indian-giver
Takes a lick and craps right out
Candy-assed, without a doubt

Consider six times, once again
This over-rated cream puff organ
Share with me a round or three
Have a drink in memory
Of the sixth new liver
That pussed out on me.

Milestones

1983: Red Bagel is thrown out of a casino for counting cards. He is not cheating, merely trying to settle a bet with a friend on how many decks the casino uses.

Now Hiring

James Bondian Action Hero. Must be proficient in fire arms and small mechanical gadgets with ridiculous capabilities. Responsibilities include killing unnamed lackeys and doing battle with bizarre supervillians of non-distinct European origin. Good benefits, adventure, and pussy galore.

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2.	Baghdad Denny's, open 24 hours, breakfast anytime
3.	Foreign film section of Alabama Blockbuster
4.	Baby's momma house
5.	Don Imus

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