The Golden Potion

February 18, 2002

nce upon a time
Or so goes the line
I heard tell a notion
Of a gold magic potion
Its power mysterious,
A bouquet quite delirious
It filled all who drink
With the charm of a king
The strength of ten oxen
For lifting or boxing,
The smell of a flower
And ten times the power,
Eyes that would dazzle
And a wit that would frazzle
The smartest of Greeks,
Send them crying for weeks.

It came in a vial
Gold like a sun's smile,
And gave off an odor
More than peculiar
And all who came near
Fled quickly in fear
And assumed without stirring
The vial contained urine

One day was a man
Who wandered this land
With no sense of smell
And then no way to tell
What lurked in the beaker
That lay near his sneakers
Despite better judgment,
He drank deeply of it,
And found all the gifts
From the previous list
Bestowed upon him
Much to his chagrin

Yet no one believed
And quickly took leave
Despite all his pleas
They said he drank pee

Quote of the Day

“Learning without thought is labor lost; except in public schools, where it keeps most teachers employed.”

-Confused-ass Carmen

Fortune 500 Cookie

You'll have a brush with death this week, and that fucker has some of the yellowest teeth you've ever seen, so make sure you go first. This time the lyrics to the song you're pretending to know the words to actually are "Watermelon, Watermelon, Watermelon." You'll make the most expensive movie ever made in your kitchen this week, for ten dollars. Lucky strikes, camels, kools, and bel-airs.

Try again later.

Top 5 Reasons You Won't Have to Kick Around the commune For Anymore

1.	Itâ€™s expensive to run state of the art website and Dippinâ€™ Dots franchise at the same time
2.	You assholes simply refused to spell our name appropriately in lowercase letters
3.	All of this was for date with girl at Blockbuster; she donâ€™t work there no more
4.	Less writing and online publishing leaves more time to hang out at coffee shop writing thinly veiled autobiographic novel
5.	You never loved us

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