Sunflakeby Violet Tiara ![]() December 24, 2001 Oh, to be a phantom sunflakeresting on the bile. A single, golden, shining sunflake, gurgling in the Nile. An elf's aorta, a unicorn's anus— none could be as sweet. As to be a lonely sunflake munching on a leek. Rainbows tease me, ogres please me, dragons wax my car. But to be a perfect sunflake would take the cake by far. When the grass is green like acid-washed jeans and the faeries are screwing the birds, there shines on the lovely sunflake… too heavenly for words. I once caught a sparkling sunflake in the palm of my hand. It burned straight through like I was butter… And now I can't play tennis. Quote of the Day“Don't stop eating out tomorrow. Don't stop, the fries will soon be here. The food'll be better than before. Breakfast is gone, breakfast is gone.”-Fleetwood MacDonalds Fortune 500 CookieDon't give up on your search for unconditional love this week: it's keeping the rest of us amused. Try finding a breakfast cereal that doesn't contain quite so much garlic. You will be arrested for taking off your pants this week, and assaulted by the stranger you take them off of. This week's lucky way- underground dance moves: The Drunken Swordfish, The Statue, Degenerative Disc Failure, The Herpe, Clap Your Thighs Say Ouch, The Go Home Alone, The I'm Getting My Ass Kicked This Ain't a Dance Move Please For the Love of God Help Me.Try again later. More Top Rejected Muppets
The Visitors Snooty bugle-playing burglars Why do you bother me? Go to hell, you naked buglers Cease your melody. Who invited uncooked hamhocks All these pigs I see? Go away, freeloading pork pies Get out my Christmas tree. Get out Santa, get out Elvis Get out... (12/10/01) Distraction Fifteen phantom penpoints All under my control I move them deftly, swiftly smearing ink upon a single slice of paper. Sixteen sweatered titties Distracting me so simply from my fifteen phantom penpoints Nothing worthwhile written, once... (11/26/01) Shuns Who has been flushing your worldly possessions? Replacing your wardrobe with out-of-date fashions? Making your schnauzer do Nixon impressions? Squeezing your neighbors for seedy confessions? Coating your lips with pre-cancerious lesions? ... (11/12/01) |