07/24/26
Like a big, gay hat of wisdom
|  Shunsby E.L. Pout   November 12, 2001 Who has been flushing your worldly possessions?
Replacing your wardrobe with out-of-date fashions? Making your schnauzer do Nixon impressions? Squeezing your neighbors for seedy confessions? Coating your lips with pre-cancerious lesions? Showing you slides of infected abrasions? Accusing your mother of being a Russian? Filling your mind with intemperate passions? Splitting your food into practical rations? Loading your pickup with refugee Haitians? Mocking your cock in some lewd animations? Cutting your paycheck by raising inflation? Wrecking your travel with tropical depressions? Selling your free time as one-hour sessions? Telling your family about past transgressions? Tilling your tulips and planting impatiens? Shipping your panties to greedy Alsatians? Sorry, I'm busy with my own regressions. Quote of the Day“Any man who serves as his own lawyer has a fool for a client. Because think about it, stupid, why you gonna pay some guy who didn't even go to law school? That's just dumb. And how do you pay yourself, anyway? Take your money out of one pocket and put it in the other? Silly. Or maybe you've got to hire a neutral third party to take the money and then hand it back to you, like a lawyer or somebody. Shit, this is gettin' expensive.”-Dred Scott Drummond Fortune 500 CookieYou're simply the best, and that depresses us all. The next time you're on trial for murder, don't forget to mention that a Klondike bar was involved. And if you must ask for a lawyer who can get you off, at least try not to do it with that smarmy leer in your eye. Try chewing your food an odd number of times this week, like 6,372. This week's lucky injuries: hangnail, hangankle, ruptured spleen, stabitosis.Try again later. Top Scientific Discoveries, Week of 5/21/07
 The Waistland April be the month that's meaner Than a shot of carburetor cleaner Or an icy, uncooked wiener Said the raven: "Ned's a Whore". "Ain't my lookout," said the genie, in a voice so tiny, teeny Ned thought it a baby, beanie And burned down the... (10/29/01) The Crab "I'm only ingesting asbestos in jest," said the tapdancing monkey with blood on his vest; I told him that I didn't think it was funny. "Who says you know funny, you ignorant fuck?" he said with a sneer, and I urged him to suck my cock, because... (10/15/01) Victim There's a gray hole in my - shall we call it a soul? Is that what it is? A soul? There's a gray hole in my soul where you ripped out my - shall we call it a heart? Do souls have hearts? There's a gray hole in my soul where you ripped out my... (10/1/01)            |
Reproduction in hole or in parts without permission is likely to piss off her dad big time.