Victim

by Thurston Honeycutt

October 1, 2001

There's a gray hole
in my -
shall we call it a soul?
Is that what it is?
A soul?

There's a gray hole
in my
soul
where you ripped
out my -
shall we call it a
heart?
Do souls have
hearts?

There's a gray hole
in my
soul
where you ripped
out my
heart.

But you and I,
we shall not
speak
of that tonight.

You and I
are four hundred miles
apart
tonight.

While you, you
are safe behind your locked
door,
safe
with your unanswered
phone,
I am drowning.
Drowning.

I am filling in the gray hole
in my
soul
where you ripped
out my
heart
with vodka
and cranberry.

Telling the man
on the barstool
beside me
the story of the gray hole
in my
soul
where you ripped
out my
heart

not to mention the
restraining orders
the locked doors and
windows
and the many many
many
unanswered
phone calls.

He says he has no
sympathy.

So when the paramedics
get here,
I am going to ask them
to treat me
first.

Because who is suffering
drowning
and suffering
more -
me, with the gray hole
in my
soul
where you ripped
out my
heart,

or him,
with his little
bloody nose?

Quote of the Day

“Patriotism is the last refuge of the scoundrel. The second to last refuge of the scoundrel is a cave in the Ozarks. Third to last? Under the bed in a four-star hotel in Paris. Fourth? Puns. Puns are the fourth-to-last refuge of the scoundrel.”

-Johnuel Samson

Fortune 500 Cookie

Whoever cut your jib, they fucked it all up, dude. Try wearing more spandex this week, your current quantities aren't providing sufficient coverage. Remember: an ounce of prevention is worth an inch of milk-fed veal. This week's lucky pizza restaurant mascots: The Noidette, Little Greaser, Humpy the Pizza Camel, "Cheese Dick" Richard Romano, Lumpy-Thighed Sex Goddess Valotta Ricotta.

Try again later.

Top 5 Things Heard on Election Night

1.	"Now keep in mind, with only 2% of the precincts reporting, it could go either way. But it certainly looks good for Mr. Nader at the moment."
2.	"What the fuck is that blue one? Vermont?"
3.	"The polls have just closed, and thank God, the bars are just openingâ€¦"
4.	"I can't believe thisâ€”even Wyoming has an electoral vote."
5.	"This is not happeningâ€¦ this is not happeningâ€¦."

in DAD'S basement
at night A lone i watch HAPPY DAYS whilst sleeping lies dad turn it DOWN says dad and bangs upon the floor sometimes i wish i was the FONZ make believe dad was mr. C he would give fatherly advice instead of calling me shithead i would bring home... (9/17/01)

Hairy Walnuts
I fed my cat some hairy walnuts My poor kitty doesn't like hairy walnuts I forced the cat to eat those nuts and then I watched him puke them up He ran away when he was done and hasn't come back yet I don't think he ever will that stupid cat ... (7/16/01)