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05/24/26   
Where the customer is always... riiiiight.

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Quote of the Day
“There ain't no cure for the summertime blues. Or HIV. Boy, AIDS, that must suck. This has been a Public Service Announcement from Eddie Cochran.”

-Eddie Cochran
Fortune 500 Cookie
Look to the stars for guidance: preferably someone who's been in a big movie in the last five years. You will go to the bathroom this week. Don't be fooled by your lack of progress in life: things can still get much worse. This week's lucky gelatin desserts: Jell-O Jigglers, Jell-O Epileptics, Limp Hicks, Greased Piggie Bites, Spineless Weasels, Slime Dogs.


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Top-Grossing Documentaries
1.Dicking Around on the Set of 'Attack of the Clones'
2.The Making of Anal Armageddon
3.Thomas Kincade: Watch Me Shine
4.The Making of Anal Armageddon 2: The Lost Footage
5.More Kittens Batting at String