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12/13/25   
Sharks with wheels, baby.

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Milestones
1965: commune columnist Rok Finger coins the slang term "Dingleberry" at a father-son picnic attended solely by his numerous illegitimate offspring.
Now Hiring
Doormat. Co-dependant with poor sense of boundaries needed to do the work of three men and two women, allowing the commune to do our part in this jobless recovery. Cot in back available for qualified applicant.
Worst Things to Yell in Church
1."Who the hell I gotta fuck to get a communion wafer around here?"
2."Father, bless me for I have pissed the confessional again…"
3."Altar boy sleepover? Bitchin'!"
4."Gawd, did you see that dude up there nailed to that cross? Creeeep-y!"
5."Am I the only one here for the monster truck show?"