Milestones
1969: Red Bagel finds true calling when he stumbles on to faked moon landing being filmed in his local neighborhood YMCA.Now Hiring
Ring-Bearer. Seeking meek carrier of unholy evil, pure of heart and with will to accomplish impossible deed. Three references and two years of experience necessary, start at minimum wage.Top 5 Pre-Rapture Activities
| 1. | Making fun of people who believe in the rapture |
| 2. | Borrowing money from people who believe in the rapture |
| 3. | Ironic Masturbation |
| 4. | Angry Birds |
| 5. | Monopoly: Rapture Edition, or prayer, whatever everybody’s up for |
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