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09/8/26   
The alternative to good news

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Quote of the Day
“Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever. This means you, Gerardo.”

-Napoleon Bugglyparte
Fortune 500 Cookie
Finally, you'll win that annual shit-talkin' contest. If the shoe fits, it still means you only have one shoe, dumbass. It may hurt, but don't worry, they can re-attach it if you put the testicle on ice quickly. Don't buy the lottery ticket this week—your money is better invested in cookie dough. Lucky marbles: steely, cat's eyes, and… uh… shit, we're fresh out of marbles.


Try again later.
Top 5 commune Features This Week
1.Me vs. the Turkey Vulture: How the Turkey Vulture Cheated
2.101 Things You Can Sell for Crack
3.Touched by an Angel: "I Was Molested by Gabriel"
4.Uncle Macho's Pork Vegan Salad
5.The Moral Majority's Make-Up Tips for Whores