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05/9/26   
Frankly my dear, we don't fucking care

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Milestones
1969: Red Bagel finds true calling when he stumbles on to faked moon landing being filmed in his local neighborhood YMCA.
Now Hiring
Ring-Bearer. Seeking meek carrier of unholy evil, pure of heart and with will to accomplish impossible deed. Three references and two years of experience necessary, start at minimum wage.
Top 5 Pre-Rapture Activities
1.Making fun of people who believe in the rapture
2.Borrowing money from people who believe in the rapture
3.Ironic Masturbation
4.Angry Birds
5.Monopoly: Rapture Edition, or prayer, whatever everybody’s up for