"I'm interested in your investment Higgins but must you keep using my hands as ashtrays?"

"June ... why don't we just cancel our subscription ... the garden's getting mighty full of paperboys, you know."

The Pop-Up version of The Necronomicon was a much bigger seller than anyone ever expected...

I DON'T GET IT!

"The study lamp is rebelling! Oh, why was Man so prideful to think he could handle such uncontrollable technology?"

Cameron Diaz IS.... very very high. Next slide...

"Please leave the room sweetheart. Daddy's busy with the IRS man..."

"I'm takin' this ear with me, June... just for safekeepin', you understand." "Aw, pa... you still haven't give me back my pinky from last week!"

"Excuse us Sir but we'd like to rent a room." "This is the morgue." "Well, a slab for my wife then..."

Just a minute, Jenkins. This badger is almost finished giving birth to me.

Most people's bathroom stench doesn't carry past a closed door. Then there's Betty.

"About the tea party sir..." "Silence Jenkins! I'm negotiating." "Those are dolls sir." "Hush!" "There's no tea. It's air." "You're fired, Jenkins." "Yes sir."

"Travis, you made the papers again." "Really, Jodie? Supercool! Heh heh."

I DON'T GET IT!

Hey kids! Can you guess what the cinematographer's on? Write down your guess on a 5x3 card and send it to...

The head of Fuchi America was found dead in his living room with a javelin in the base of his skull. Lone Star Security has no suspects.

"This is not my beautiful house. This is not my beautiful wife. At least, I don't remember dicing her up like that and tearing up the floorboards."

I DON'T GET IT!