"Yes, funny. I love it. More."

"I'm gonna go check my oil... I think I'm running a few quarts low, I keep hearing this knocking noise in my head." "No dear, someone's at the door! Go get it!"

ACTION PANTS to the rescue!

"Damn you honey! I told you not to touch it! From now on, the Weber grill goes everywhere I do!"

"Table for two mister Trenchcoat? Smoking? Right this way......right this.....hello?"

"Martini mister shrubbery? By all....oh, hello mister Twig, looking good..."

"They may not understand you mister Lava Lamp, but I do. I'll get them to listen, one way or another..."

"What's that booze? You bought me a present? Lets see...Hey! More booze! Thanks booze!"

"And because the muderer left the one vital clue, the December issue of Life Magazine, I can say without any doubt that the killer was... YOU, COFFEE TABLE!"

"Oh, only you can know the heavenly ways of men so well, beautiful banana....c'mon, gimmie some sugar..."

"What's that, left ear? You say Timmy's fallen down the well? Let's go!"

"Yes madam, allow me to converse with my legal partner for a moment. Thank you... Mister Foreskin, what would you suggest?"

"You know, I like these quiet times Martha, where I'm home alone, I can take you out of your casket and just...cuddle."

One of the climactic end scenes from "It's A Godawful Life"... *running* *flips the bird* Fuck you lamp-post! Fuck you Safeway! Fuck you mailbox!..."

Meanwhile on "Fun With Doorknobs"...