Reed Fillmore, world's stupidest butler. He hates turning the lights out after the master has gone to bed. Unscrewing those hot bulbs always burns his hand.

Ronald was compelled to leave the room. He could barely tolerate the notion of golden showers, but this green chunky shower idea of Rob and Meg's was too much.

As Leona Helsmley accidently drops the bucket of water on herself, the sweatshop full of winged monkeys cheers with glee.

Marvin suffers a crisis of conscience during his night shift: his wife forgot to pack his lunch, and surely no one would miss just ONE body...

Jack the Ripper caught most of his victims off-guard by suddenly springing out of the chests of their dates.

Jim's office party took an interesting turn when he noticed he was the only guest with a reflection.

As a young man, aimless and without purpose, Cap'n Crunch was given to molesting women and shouting, "Keep me soggy in your milk!" Sick fuck.

"Uh, Bob, the Angel of Death just walked into my office. I think I'm gonna have to call you back."

Bob had been off of the Subway for a half an hour before he realized someone had stolen his nipples.

Not really understanding the basic concept of mirrors, Stanley was horrified when he was approached by his doppleganger.

John Hurskerbrugmeister: Inventor of the Naughty Barbie.

Darren really needed those stiff drinks whenever grandpa started his spontaneous pelvic thrust spells.

Some folks are said to have a green thumb, a certain talent with plants. Jerry had a black thumb. He said it was 'cause he was into pudding. We don't know.

Martha never really cared about flaunting her jock itch in public.

Dean thought his luck was in: He was making passes at twins and they were both digging his action! Then he realized it was a mirror...