Remember when the bunny used to leave chocolate eggs? Pretentious bastard!

Sister Glaack doesn't use a ruler. She simply raps students knuckles with her 10 inch tongue.

Bea Arthur in a Golden Girls blooper.

"Zek said that Klork said that Jibwok told his sister's boyfriend's brother that Glak likes you!"

"Day Fourteen, she seems confident that we are on the path back to civilization, but something tells me that Tori Spelling is as lost in this house as I am."

.oO(Damn, never should have bit that pufferfish, sure hope this swelling goes down in time for my date.)

'Course the fire department's plan to make it easier to see, and therefore much safer, backfired when people were impaled and/or electrocuted after landing on it.

"...and that's why computers are so important." "Is that a Communist flag back there?" "Oh course not, commrade,uh I mean Bob."

Pull on my neckerchief and I'll say one of five exciting phrases!

"And when I wake up in the morning, I look at all the confusing knobs and bright thingees on the coffeemaker, and it hurts... right here."

"Pull his string for any one of the following exciting phrases: 'The trade deficit is waning,' 'Investments are cummulative,' and many more!"

She has huuuuge...tracts of land.

Shaving her legs with batman special effects

"Hi! I'm Chase Masterson, and...and...*fzzrrccraaack*..." *snap* *thud* "Dammit! Her head fell off again! Get the tech crew back in here!"

They were later fined $50 per stolen traffic cone

The odd result of cross-breeding a human with a hamster. On the plus side, he can carry four quarter-pounders at a time in there.

Near sighted assassins in the next issue of "Guns and Glasses."

"For another opinion, we now go to an average man in the street." "Well, I think-" *BEEP BEEP!* *CRASH!* "Augh!"

"Hey! This is apple juice I've been drinking! That means the doctor got my urine sample! D'oh!" (Capper switcheroo #1)

Tom displays his latest CAT-scan.

Steve is rather smug for a guy who's just had most of his epidermis removed.

OK, OK...I know the Sci-Fi Channel's got a broad definition of "Sci-Fi" ...but the Zsa Zsa and Havey Korman Variety Hour?!?!?!

Deborah come from a poor family. She had to sell her last name to buy food for her children.

"Now gettin' the torso through is the tough part, see? But once ya got the lower extremities into those whirling blades- whooboy! Talk about yer gravy..."

Oooo, no, I'm sorry, Rod, the answer was "Burma" --looks like we've nuked your wife! We'll return to "Let's Nuke Your Wife" after this...

"And as for these claims that I'm lacking in intelligence, I can only say- ACK! SPIDERS! Oh! Phew! Just my hands folks... anyway..."

And you may find yourself... surfing porn in your underwear... and you may tell yourself... this is not my beautiful site, this is not my beautiful wife!

Extreme Jenga, now if you pull out the wrong piece, it shoots out and impales you!

Timothy Leary proudly displays the gaul stone he passed in 1969.

Bill's simple game of cat's cradle got pretty rough.

Next, on the new game show Spit or Swallow, contestant Vanessa makes a decision which could earn a vacation in Hawaii for two!

You know you need a Certs® when you can see your own breath at room temperature.

"Perhaps you were unware but a well-placed stick of butter or oleo can correct most posture problems. And it feels sooooooo good..."

"And now... some pictures of my vacation to the Vatican. It all started with a random autopsy on a Turkish gnome..."

"Tonight's broadcast will be done by Squeaky the Hand Puppet."

"Look I tell ya! Nude pantyhose! A socket wrench! You people just don't get it do you!?"