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Have You Ever Loved?
by Violet Tiara 


Monday, Mar. 4, 2002
Have you ever loved
like the whistling wind
of a barn swallow’s nostril-hole?
Have you ever lived
like a merchant prince
on quiche and curry dumplings?
I think not.

Have you ever stared
into the face of time
like a fearless mutant hunchback
with a huge sword and a locket around his
neck that contains a picture of a tulip?
Ha, I find it truly unlikely.

Have you ever sung
the song that meal-mice sing
when the stars line up
and form a picture of
deposed Chinese dictator Quang-Sin-Joon?
I don’t believe you.

Have you ever dreamed
the way that oceans dream
of ice ages and black holes?
Have you ever smelled
an odor so complex
it carried the secrets of the universe?
Not as long as I’ve known you.

Have you ever danced
on an enchanted morn
with Irish water spirits
and some kind of bizarre
half dog-man who’s always
carrying a freshly cooked pizza?
I’d like to see you prove it.

Have you ever pulled
your own throat out
through your mouth and
then played your intestines
like a bagpipe?

Really? I could barf!





Milestones
2000: Ramrod Hurley is hired as a commune correspondent after the failure of his startup internet company, www.poopoftheday.com.

Now Hiring
Extras. Positions available for extras in Boogie Nights 2. Minimum wage, lunch provided as well as SAG credit. Full frontal nudity required, well-endowed equipment or prosthetics a plus.
Bestselling Books
1. 
The Tired Lawyer Concept
John Grisham
2. 
Sexual Intercourse For Dummies
Mitch Harvey
3. 
Networking For Assholes
Kelly Ward
4. 
Spanish For the Impotent
Dean Harmon
5. 
The Dysfunctional Family Who Could Not Suppress Their Problems For One Lousy Thanksgiving
Rupert Baird



Copyright © 2002 the.commune Inc. All rights reserved.
Reproduction in whole or in part without permission is likely to piss off her dad big-time.




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