Americans Everywhere Now Experts on George Harrison Death of Beatle spawns temporary retention of key facts in his life BYRAMON NOOTLES Washington, DC
AP
George Harrison, the "Quiet Beatle," unfortunately much quieter now
Nov. 29, 2001 America lost another revered musician and inspiration for thousands of
musicians in George Harrison, member of the Beatles and solo artist since 1970. Harrison
was 58.
And news of Harrison’s death and pervasive media coverage has made everyone in
America an expert on the life and music of George Harrison, at least for a while.
“Harrison was never interested in school work,” said New York City bartender Rupert
Holmes. “But he really enjoyed a guitar his mother bought him for £3. He would sit in his
room and practice for hours, until his fingers bled.”
“Harrison formed the Quarrymen with John Lennon, which soon included bandmate and
future Beatle Paul McCartney,” said Alice Carter, a real estate agent in Twin Falls, Idaho.
“The band eventually changed its name to the Beatles, a play on the word ‘beat,’ and honed
their craft in a seedy club in Hamburg.”
Greg Batley, a 29-year-old mechanic from Atlanta, Georgia, continued: “Harrison grew as
a songwriter working alongside Lennon and McCartney. He would continue to become a
fantastic songwriter in his own right, contributing hits over the years like ‘The Taxman,’ ‘
While My Guitar Gently Weeps,’ “Something,’ and ‘Here Comes the Sun.’”
Batley hummed the latter composition for a few minutes.
“He introduced America to the sitar,” stated Kansas City, Missouri police officer Mark
Kite. “He became friends and musically influenced by Ravi Shankar. While in his personal
life he became intrigued by eastern philosophy and religion, a fascination which he passed
on to the other Beatles.”
“After the break-up of the Beatles,” said John Ulee, a Seattle-based computer
programmer, “Harrison was the first to experience solo success with a composition called
‘My Sweet Lord.’ He went on to put together the Concert for Bangladesh, the first all-star
benefit of its kind. Years before ‘We Are the World.’”
Minor League baseball player Wes Murphy of Durham, North Carolina continued: “In later
years, Harrison’s biggest success in music was from the hit ‘Got My Mind Set on You’ off
his album Cloud 9, and also with Tom Petty, Roy Orbison, Jeff Lynne, and Bob
Dylan as a member of The Traveling Wilburys. Harrison said of the low-key experience,
‘It beats being a Beatle.’”
“Harrison experienced his first bout with cancer in the late ‘90s,” said baker Lynette
McKeegan of Salt Lake City, Utah. “In ’99 he was assaulted by a deranged fan, from
which he recovered, but cancer only dug in deeper and in late November he lost his battle
with it. Harrison leaves behind a $300 million estate to his wife and his son, it’s like Donnie,
but there’s an ‘H’ in there, I think. Harrison was 58.”
The amazing retention of Harrison information astounds even self-proclaimed Beatles fans.
“I have all their CDs,” said Rich Carlisle of Pennsauken, New Jersey, “and I always kept
forgetting he wrote, ‘For You, Blue.’ Kept thinking it was McCartney. And I didn’t know
he had a girlfriend that left him for Eric Clapton. I’m starting to think I’m not much of a fan
at all.”
The retention, however complete right now, is expected to fade gradually as Americans
mourn Harrison’s loss and move on to the next expired celebrity.
“I love Harrison,” said Craig Bachman of Orlando, Florida, “and I’ve been burning out a
recent copy of All Things Must Pass I bought last year. But I don’t know how long
I’ll remember he was behind Handmaid Films which made Time Bandits and
Monty Python’s The Life of Brian. I’m already starting to forget Jack Lemmon was
in The Apartment. Lemmon was 76.”
the commune news was just showing the gun to a friend when it went off, officer. Watch
Ramon Nootles try to juggle three different women in a fun, high-powered romp—
not in a movie or TV show, but later tonight at his apartment.
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