Show us where the bad man touched you
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Quote of the Day
“We'll meet again. You might say that's impossible, since people can only meet once, but they haven't factored in my patented time machine and early-onset Alzheimer's.”-Capt. Don Spacegain, Year 3054
Fortune 500 Cookie
Now's the perfect time to launch your alternative news website. Thursday's haul proves your friend's theory that the Halloween is really the only lucrative time for trick-or-treating. For your information, he's going to shoot his old woman down 'cause he caught her messing 'round with some other man; you don't need to know everything. Lucky son of a bitch.Try again later.
Top 5 Reasons You Won't Have to Kick Around the commune For Anymore
| 1. | It’s expensive to run state of the art website and Dippin’ Dots franchise at the same time |
| 2. | You assholes simply refused to spell our name appropriately in lowercase letters |
| 3. | All of this was for date with girl at Blockbuster; she don’t work there no more |
| 4. | Less writing and online publishing leaves more time to hang out at coffee shop writing thinly veiled autobiographic novel |
| 5. | You never loved us |
BY shamu wells d'froad
6/24/2002
I smoked a thin cigarette quickly in one puff. It was what I do. I'm currently unemployed.
From the end of the beach I could see the shaky man coming, walking his dog. The shaky man is called that, by me, because of his never-ending addict trembles that riddle his body. I don't know his name, I've always called him the shaky man, though the dog's name is Boner.
"Bon jour, Boner," I say, feeling it would be silly to address the man, whose name I do not know.
"Don't talk to my dog, you insignificant French asshole," says the shaky man. He has a slight stutter when he says "t-t-t-t-talk" and "F-F-F-F-French." I can't say I disagree with him, I certainly am insignificant and French. I suppose I'm an asshole as well, at least as the standard slang meaning...
