E_B_A:
"You're still sitting here? It's been three hours!" "These invisible Rubik's Cube things are difficult!" "That's it! Time we lowered your dosage!"
Jazzsoda:
"We meet again OB-1." "And for the last time, Vader!" *vwoooo* *vwwwwooo* "Dad! Have you seen my shower on a cereal box!" curtain rod and my robe?" "...no!"
Artanas:
Thank you for flying Delta...
echostation:
"What's this?" "Oh, that's my bacon bill." "You have a bill JUST for bacon?!!"
E_B_A:
"Thanks to Lemon Pledge, we'll have this clean in a jiffy!" "That's the universe, Marge!" "Yep! And look at the way it wipes up those constellations!" "Ick!"
Flanker:
"You want one of *these* for Christmas?"
Geier:
...On second thought, DON'T leave the driving to them.
Artanas:
Jackie Chan in a role that will leave you highly dismayed... "Push! Push! I can almost see the feet!"
E_B_A:
Sadly, Girardo just wasn't as Suave at 73.
HanoverF:
Remote controlled breast feeding.
E_B_A:
"The Red Balloon 2: Helium Apocalypse"
Artanas:
Betty just loved wrapping herself in a pair of nice and toasty Dom Deluise briefs...
Hippie:
Doors, windows... all these small exits here just to mock me!
Artanas:
"Kiss me Keanu!" "Oh, Dr. Ruth!"
E_B_A:
"Don't mind the spurting blood. I've had my skin reduced." "Reduced?" "Well, tightened." "Ick." "Don't you find me sexy?" *THUD!*
E_B_A:
It's always a nice touch to send your hostage's parents a nice photo by Olan Mills with the ransom note.
Jazzsoda:
"I am the jeannie of the skoal tin! I shall grant you three wishes, then give you rectal cancer!" "Uhhhh..." "That's one!" "Shit!" "Two!"
Artanas:
"Paper or plastic?" "Skin." "ACK!"
Hippie:
Inspector Krueger, Arson... why does everyone laugh when I say that?
E_B_A:
"Man! You're scary lookin'! What's with your neck!?" "Want some Pez?" *POP* "Ick!"
Jazzsoda:
Well, that's what's to be expected when you hire a known flasher to be the school librarian.
Angel_Noir:
"And he put his...'thing' right here!" "And he was singing?" "Yeah, he was singing 'Hail to the Chief!'"
Jazzsoda:
"You're my kind of guy, Stump. Anything you ever need, you know who to come to." "Please, beat me off." "Like I said, I've never seen you before, get out of my room."
E_B_A:
Burning question of the day: Where is Ross Perot right now?
Shifter:
Beth vainly tried to hide the fact that she was slowly mutating into a massive jujubee.
E_B_A:
Quick! Can you spot Keuana Reeve's cat scan? Use your skill!
JediClone:
Meanwhille, back in the Friday The 13th The Series lot... "ROBEY!Getcher hair outta my room!" "*muffled* What? I cant hear you! I'm downstairs!"
JediClone:
"Egads! This polyograph machine was fibbing the whole time!" "Call the governer! And pray it's not too late!"
E_B_A:
"Why Mary. Are not those but bosoms that cling to yonder door?"
Seltaeb:
"Junior, your mom and I need to talk to you. You remember about nine years ago, we asked you to mow the lawn..."
Orphan:
"If I win you have to buy me dinner-" "And if I win...well, let's just say you might as well get used to living on your back..."
Sarchasm:
The elderly are compelled to swim upstream every year to this location for spawning.
E_B_A:
"Hello... you've reached the Invisible Phone Company... can you hold please?"
E_B_A:
Margot spots the border gaurds and desperately tries to conceal her newly purchased white-slave in her coat.
Shifter:
Henri, being French, didn't yet understand that there was a difference between a fireplace and a urinal.
E_B_A:
Steve's freaky ability to regurgitate live children got him a brief stint on the talk show circut before the authorities began to investigate.
quickdraw:
"We can put 'em right over here by The Ark Of The Covanent"
E_B_A:
It's always fun to spike Bil Keene's brownies. "Billy! Who set fire to the snakes in my skull!?" "Not me!"
Occupant:
Takes a licking and keeps on tick... uh, what's it doing there? Dissolving? That can't be right.
Saltydog:
Looking around, Margaret could not see the bike's owner. So she added yet another Schwinn to her already fabulous collection.
Seltaeb:
If you have a black hole in your living room, dress it up with a small patio.
