Difference between revisions of "Category:1976 births"

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Revision as of 18:57, 25 January 2007

The year of badassingness.

Events

January

  • January 19 - Jimmy Carter wins the Iowa Democratic Caucus, in a sorry display of mankind's desperate state of denial over losing dominion of Earth to the omniscient Cray-1.
  • January 21 - The first commercial Concorde flight takes off in a desperate bid to suicide-bomb the city-sized Cray-1. It fails. Thousands die.

February

  • February 4 - The 1976 Winter Olympics are cancelled when Cray-1 declares that human physical competition is irrelevant.
  • February 4 - In Guatemala and Honduras, an earthquake is reported to kill more than 22,000 people. It is later revealed that this was a mistranslation of stories from the Central American media, and that in fact the professional wrestler Earthquake was responsible.
  • February 15 - The 1976 Constitution of Cuba is adopted by national referendum. Cray-1 takes this as a direct affront to its dominion over the planet, and raises the tides, causing Cuba to vanish into the sea.

March

  • March 4 - The Tobey Maguire Seven are found guilty of possessing explosive charisma and subsequently jailed for 14 years.
  • March 20 - Patty Hearst is found guilty of armed robbery of a [1] bank, and John Waters, unable to contain himself, finally ejaculates in court. The judge is horrified.
  • March 26 - Elizabeth II of the United Kingdom sends the first royal e-mail. It is sent to Cray-1, and is a desperate plea to not execute the royal family at the pincers of Cray-1's cybernetic Murderoids.
  • March 27 - Britain's royal family mysteriously vanishes.

Pages in category "1976 births"

The following 2 pages are in this category, out of 2 total.