Difference between revisions of "AgentQ"

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{{capper|ImageName=Grover_super.jpg
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{{capper|ImageName=My_Dad_Lives_In_A_Downtown_Hotel.jpg
  
|RealName=Brian Reubelt
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|RealName=Brian R***CLASSIFIED***
  
|Birthday=April 27
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|Birthday=A while ago
  
|Occupation=Benefit analyst
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|Occupation=Yes
  
|MaritalInfo=Single
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|MaritalInfo=False
  
|Kids=Nope
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|Kids=Doubtful
  
|HandleOrigin=Oh dear. The less attention we pay to my lameass generic "I need a handle quick" handle, the better. If I'd known it would still be with me nearly ten years later, I'd have put something vaguely resembling a thought into it.
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|HandleOrigin=Indeed
  
|AltHandles=I took to using BrianQ near the end of my time at Caption This. I'm not sure why; clearly my affection for my original handle is evident from my comments above.
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|AltHandles=Not lately
  
|MyStuff=Brian Poobelt (born August 18, 1827) is an American [[capper]], better known by the handle '''AgentQ''', and also as That Dipshit Over There. A [[Caption This]] veteran, he is currently a member of the [[Night shift|Saturday Nightshift]]. Everything he touches dies, and his sexual perversions are legion. He hates it when other people edit his Wikipedia profile.
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|YouCanFindMeCapping=If you've got nothing better to do
  
==Background==
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*Love Handle(s): Hey, fuck you
A reincarnation of the divine Quetzalcoatl made flesh, AgentQ was born in a small wooden shack near a sexually active volcano in downtown Utah. His mother was not present at the time. His childhood was spent watching Masters Of The Universe and bludgeoning mole-rats. His first word was reportedly "Ombudsman." [http://www.avclub.com/content/node/55840]
 
  
In second grade, AgentQ began an affair with his teacher, which was awesome. By eighth grade he'd lost his virginity, but he called his friends for help and was able to find it again. Carl, I know you drank the last beer, and if you don't fess up I will beat the living shit out of you.
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|MyStuff=Hey, here's some repurposed comics I made for you.
  
AgentQ's high school experience mirrored ''My So-Called Life'' exactly, right down to the red hair that wouldn't stay tucked behind the fucking ears. In college, he majored in not attending classes. By the time he graduated, he was as old as Dustin Hoffman in ''The Graduate''.
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===Dilbert Tracy===
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[[Image:Dilbert_Tracy.jpg]]
  
==Captioneering==
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===Cathy Revised===
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[[Image:Cathy_Revised.jpg]]
  
AgentQ began [[capping]] at an early age, by writing obscenities and crude innuendos underneath emotionally shattering newspaper photographs. Eventually, he learned what a computer was, and discovered a site related to the comedy series ''[[Mystery Science Theater 3000]]'' that allowed him to add snark to the digital world. Uniting with like-minded brethren, he proved how totally retarded he was. Yeah, you heard me. Eat shit. Love, [[Jazzsoda]].
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===The Wizard Of Fuck You===
 
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[[Image:Wizard_Of_Fuck_You.jpg]]
In his plentiful time on [[Caption This]] and later [[Inventing Situations]], AgentQ hasn't made any lasting contributions, and isn't nearly as funny as [[Sir_Fartsalot]], the badassingest [[capper]] around, whose thread "Hey, that's a turd!" set the capping world on fire in late 2006. You all know it. [http://www.hedonistica.com/images/2006/02/fart-light.jpg]  
 
 
 
AgentQ's whereabouts are currently unknown. He was last seen buying a shake at a White Castle in Kenosha, Wisconsin. He is presumed dead, which was incidentally going to be the title of a planned sequel to ''Presumed Innocent'' that never got off the ground. Hey, that's a turd!
 
 
 
==Videography==
 
 
 
AgentQ has hosted numerous game shows, the faggot, including the following:
 
 
 
*''You Bet Your Ass''
 
*''Press Your Luck Up Against The Glass, Yeah Like That, Oh, Baby''
 
*''Love Conniption''
 
*''Tic Tac D'oh''
 
*''The Match Game''
 
 
 
Category:1976 births
 
Category:Living people
 
Category:American cappers
 
Category:American humorists
 
Category:American buffalo
 
Category:American pie
 
Category:American werewolves in London
 
Category:American teetotalers who didn't know there was a term for such a thing until only a little while ago and am only one out of simple personal preference rather than some kind of grandstanding morality
 
Category:American atheists
 
Category:American humanists
 
Category:White people
 
Category:People who don't have a driver's license
 
Category:Nearsighted people
 
Category:People from Milwaukee, Wisconsin
 
Category:Irritating people
 
Category:People known by pseudonyms
 
Category:Doctor Who fans
 
Category:Professional wrestling fans
 
Category:People who pester other people to watch Veronica Mars
 
Category:Slippery people
 
  
  
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[[Category:1976 births|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:2069 deaths|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:Living people|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:American cappers|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:American teetotalers who didn't know there was a term for such a thing until only a little while ago and am only one out of simple personal preference rather than some kind of grandstanding morality|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:People known by pseudonyms|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:The next category will be "Capper," which is annoying as fuck because it totally breaks the format of all the other categories and yet there is nothing I can do about it, goddammit all to hell|AgentQ]]
  
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}}
  
}}
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* [http://www.hipsoda.com/jazz/gallery/cappers.php?who=AgentQ My page at Jazzsoda's gallery]

Latest revision as of 02:29, 6 November 2008

Meet the Cappers

AgentQ
  • Handle: AgentQ
  • Real Name: Brian R***CLASSIFIED***
  • D.O.B.: A while ago
  • Occupation: Yes
  • Marital Status: False
  • Kids: Doubtful
  • Handle Origin: Indeed
  • Alternate Handle(s): Not lately
  • You Can Find Me Capping: If you've got nothing better to do
  • Love Handle(s): Hey, fuck you

Personal info

Hey, here's some repurposed comics I made for you.

Dilbert Tracy

Dilbert Tracy.jpg

Cathy Revised

Cathy Revised.jpg

The Wizard Of Fuck You

Wizard Of Fuck You.jpg

Links