Difference between revisions of "AgentQ"

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{{capper|ImageName=Grover_super.jpg
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{{capper|ImageName=My_Dad_Lives_In_A_Downtown_Hotel.jpg
  
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|RealName=Brian Reubelt
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|RealName=Brian R***CLASSIFIED***
  
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|Birthday=April 27
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|Birthday=A while ago
  
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|Occupation=Benefit analyst
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|Occupation=Yes
  
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|MaritalInfo=Single
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|MaritalInfo=False
  
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|Kids=Nope
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|Kids=Doubtful
  
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|HandleOrigin=Oh dear. The less attention we pay to my lameass generic "I need a handle quick" handle, the better. If I'd known it would still be with me nearly ten years later, I'd have put something vaguely resembling a thought into it.
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|HandleOrigin=Indeed
  
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|AltHandles=I took to using BrianQ near the end of my time at Caption This. I'm not sure why; clearly my affection for my original handle is evident from my comments above.
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|AltHandles=Not lately
  
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|MyStuff=Brian Poobelt (born August 18, 1827) is an [[American]] [[capper]], better known by the [[handle]] '''AgentQ''', and also as [[That Dipshit Over There]]. A [[Caption This]] veteran, he is currently a member of the [[Saturday Nightshift]]. Everything he touches dies, and his sexual perversions are legion. He hates it when other people edit his [[Wikipedia]] profile.
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|YouCanFindMeCapping=If you've got nothing better to do
  
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==Background==
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*Love Handle(s): Hey, fuck you
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A [[reincarnation]] of the divine [[Quetzalcoatl]] made flesh, AgentQ was born in a small wooden shack near a sexually active [[volcano]] in downtown [[Utah]]. His mother was not present at the time. His childhood was spent watching [[Masters Of The Universe]] and bludgeoning [[mole-rats]]. His first word was reportedly "[[Ombudsman]]." [http://www.avclub.com/content/node/55840]
 
  
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In second grade, AgentQ began an affair with his teacher, which was [[awesome]]. By eighth grade he'd lost his [[virginity]], but he called his friends for help and was able to find it again. Carl, I know you drank the last [[beer]], and if you don't fess up I will beat the living shit out of you.
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|MyStuff=Hey, here's some repurposed comics I made for you.
  
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AgentQ's high school experience mirrored ''[[My So-Called Life]]'' exactly, right down to the [[red hair that wouldn't stay tucked behind the fucking ears]]. In college, he majored in not attending classes. By the time he graduated, he was as old as [[Dustin Hoffman]] in ''[[The Graduate]]''.
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===Dilbert Tracy===
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[[Image:Dilbert_Tracy.jpg]]
  
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==Captioneering==
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===Cathy Revised===
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[[Image:Cathy_Revised.jpg]]
  
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AgentQ began [[capping]] at an early age, by writing [[obscenities]] and crude [[innuendos]] underneath emotionally shattering [[newspaper photographs]]. Eventually, he learned what a [[computer]] was, and discovered a site related to the comedy series ''[[Mystery Science Theater 3000]]'' that allowed him to add [[snark]] to the digital world. Uniting with like-minded brethren, he proved how [[totally retarded]] he was. Yeah, you heard me. Eat shit. Love, [[Jazzsoda]].
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===The Wizard Of Fuck You===
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[[Image:Wizard_Of_Fuck_You.jpg]]
  
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In his plentiful time on [[Caption This]] and later [[Inventing Situations]], AgentQ hasn't made any lasting contributions, and isn't nearly as funny as [[Sir_Fartsalot]], the [[badassingest]] [[capper]] around, whose [[thread]] "[[Hey, that's a turd!]]" set the capping world on fire in late 2006. You all know it. [http://www.hedonistica.com/images/2006/02/fart-light.jpg]
 
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AgentQ's whereabouts are currently unknown. He was last seen buying a shake at a [[White Castle]] in [[Kenosha]], Wisconsin. He is presumed dead, which was incidentally going to be the title of a planned sequel to ''[[Presumed Innocent]]'' that never got off the ground. Hey, that's a turd!
 
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==Videography==
 
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AgentQ has hosted numerous [[game shows]], the faggot, including the following:
 
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*''[[You Bet Your Ass]]''
 
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*''[[Press Your Luck Up Against The Glass, Yeah Like That, Oh, Baby]]''
 
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*''[[Love Conniption]]''
 
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*''[[Tic Tac D'oh]]''
 
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*''[[The Match Game]]''
 
  
 
[[Category:1976 births|AgentQ]]
 
[[Category:1976 births|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:2069 deaths|AgentQ]]
 
[[Category:Living people|AgentQ]]
 
[[Category:Living people|AgentQ]]
 
[[Category:American cappers|AgentQ]]
 
[[Category:American cappers|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:American humorists|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:American buffalo|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:American pie|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:American werewolves in London|AgentQ]]
 
 
[[Category:American teetotalers who didn't know there was a term for such a thing until only a little while ago and am only one out of simple personal preference rather than some kind of grandstanding morality|AgentQ]]
 
[[Category:American teetotalers who didn't know there was a term for such a thing until only a little while ago and am only one out of simple personal preference rather than some kind of grandstanding morality|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:American atheists|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:American humanists|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:White people|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:People who don't have a driver's license|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:Nearsighted people|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:People from Milwaukee, Wisconsin|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:Irritating people|AgentQ]]
 
 
[[Category:People known by pseudonyms|AgentQ]]
 
[[Category:People known by pseudonyms|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:Doctor Who fans|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:The next category will be "Capper," which is annoying as fuck because it totally breaks the format of all the other categories and yet there is nothing I can do about it, goddammit all to hell|AgentQ]]
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[[Category:Professional wrestling fans|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:People who pester other people to watch Veronica Mars|AgentQ]]
 
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[[Category:Slippery people|AgentQ]]
 
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}}
  
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}}
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* [http://www.hipsoda.com/jazz/gallery/cappers.php?who=AgentQ My page at Jazzsoda's gallery]

Latest revision as of 07:29, 6 November 2008

Meet the Cappers

AgentQ
  • Handle: AgentQ
  • Real Name: Brian R***CLASSIFIED***
  • D.O.B.: A while ago
  • Occupation: Yes
  • Marital Status: False
  • Kids: Doubtful
  • Handle Origin: Indeed
  • Alternate Handle(s): Not lately
  • You Can Find Me Capping: If you've got nothing better to do
  • Love Handle(s): Hey, fuck you

Personal info

Hey, here's some repurposed comics I made for you.

Dilbert Tracy

Dilbert Tracy.jpg

Cathy Revised

Cathy Revised.jpg

The Wizard Of Fuck You

Wizard Of Fuck You.jpg

Links

Retrieved from "http://hipsoda.com/wiki/index.php?title=AgentQ&oldid=6432"