Boris is Superbowl Party
by the commune’s Boris Utzov 

Ah, hello! How’d it happen? Yes, yes, Boris is good too.

Already Boris feel American like John Sinatra. Louis teach about football, and cheese in can. What wonderful thing! Boris press button on can, and cheese jump out like “Here I am to eat!” Boris is master of cheese.

Boris eat much can cheese while watching thing that is Superbowl. So much so that fun is had and Boris cannot make toilet for week! What way to save time. No toilet time wasting for Boris, who is busy doing Superbowl.

Talk about fun things that are Superbowl! Men in costumes who run outside, this is football. What great things this is, or as Louis say shit. What great shits we are having when men run with little turkey thing that flies. “Shit!” says Louis when turkey flies long way. “Shit!” says Boris who is having Superbowl fun.

But there is more than costumes to Superbowl, there also have nice men from government tell stories of football while wearing suit. They tell rules why mens on field not getting up. Nope! You stay down on field, you are dead. You are football dead, sorry. Boris love this part of excitement.

Louis love dancing girls who are girlfriend of players on sides. “Hello!” he cheer when they are dancing in small clothes. Louis want give them babies in ass. Ho ho! Louis is generous robot.

Boris like dancing girls, too, but they are bad at catching turkey, almost never they get that thing. But they are girls, so persons understand. No persons yell at them and they are on T.V. and happy.

Boris favorite football part is wonderful commercials which do funny thing. All times there is dog talking or little animals doing magic. Aha! Who teach those beers to play football? Boris does not know! It is a funny magic.

Speak of magic, Boris thinking America have magic beer. In Homeland, beer makes Boris fat and go home with ugly woman. But not so America! America beer make persons strong and have sexy womens and fun all times, not never woke up in dog pounds. Persons run and jump and have beer fun but not chuck up beer in back seat of taxi. And also them are on T.V.

Boris have so much fun doing Superbowl, why not invite all persons for Superbowl party? Large fun to have with many persons doing Superbowl and sharing can of cheese. So Boris press numbers on phone until persons talking to Boris.

“Hello! Boris is Superbowl party!”

Many time Boris call robots who speak not Boris language and instead answer “Baaaaaaaaaaaah…” in robot voice. Hello? Is this yes? Only robots know is this yes. If Louis home he could ask robots is this yes, but him out getting robot money.

When Louis come home Boris tell of Superbowl party and invited telephone persons and robots. Louis excited!

“Boris, you inbred beer fart, the Superbowl was last month! It’s only once a year!”

Oh, ha ha. Louis is funny with robot jokes.

Hello from Robot Apartment
Boris is lovely with life in new country. Already life like exciting rolling coaster. One time, you say “Hey, this is fun, I am in crazy train car!” and then soon another time “Make stop! Make stop for Boris to shit!” and hanging on little children while mother hits with purse. This is like Boris life.

Coming Inside America
Boris come to America, for it is land without crows. All the time in the Homeland, crows follow Boris around, laughing HA HA HA. Boris Goddamn the crows, but still they follow and laugh. Boris is sad. Also, Boris gets neighbor in belly with baby! Oh no! So, Boris is coming inside America.